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Thread: essay help

  1. #1
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    essay help

    Hey guys,
    I've got this problem each time I write an essay -- It's not that hard for me to come up with what to write but I do make lots of grammar mistakes or like my tutor says some sentences do not make sense. Sometimes I even used websites like or but I just cannot use them each time I'm writing something. So I started practicing writing. I wrote this essay and I'd love to hear your opinion. Thanks

    Topic: How do you feel about automated telephone helplines? Do you find they work or do you feel they are annoying?

    Press 1 for vagueness, press 2 for confusion, press 3 for unrelated topics, press 4 to go to a different interactive voice menu, press 5 to repeat. The options are confusing, the robotic voice is unsettling and most of the times the options stated are not sufficient to provide the customer with the help that they so desperately need. If we can be honest with ourselves, most of the times we all dial 0 to talk to an operator in the hopes that we might be able to fluently explain our problem and get a solution, which more often than not ends up just being a very polite, but very cold "please hold on the line while I transfer you to someone else". And then the circle goes round and round until we either get tired or get mad and just hang up.

    Even though an automated voice response might be useful for simple tasks like checking your account balance, or... I guess that is pretty much it; Nothing is better than a sapient and kind human voice willing to help you and even just listen to your frustration regarding the money related problems you might be having with your light bill, cable package, food complain or whatever first-world problem that so harshly hurts you at the moment, but the cost related issues that come with hiring a team to pick up the phone at a call center is not as convenient for a company as hiring a voice menu service from their local provider.
    But all of the previous two hundred and sixty something words come to little use today. Nowadays, both the IVR systems and the call center representatives have been replaced by websites and apps that are able to provide almost all the information necessary to customers of a generation that increasingly prefer to avoid human contact or any kind of struggle for that matter. If texting has successfully replaced an actual phone call, who would actually wait in line for a robotic or human voice when they can just go to their 7-inch touch screens?

  2. #2
    New Member jong_suk's Avatar
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    Re: essay help

    Hi! I'm not sure what type of essay you are trying to practice for, but if we're talking about your writing style for the HSC... Then we may have a problem! Some of the general guidelines that I follow when writing an essay are:
    - No "I" in an essay. Generally, essays are never written in first person unless that is what the question askes. ALSO, although the question askes for your opinion, a good essay is usually written in third person. Personally, I've never written an essay in first person.
    - No "I guess". Your language style is very loose, and seems to question your own judgement! A good essay begins with a thesis (an arguement) which is then sustained throughout the whole essay. Essentially, an essay is an arguement. Your essay does not sustain a thesis very well, hence readers may get confused!
    - No rhetorical questions! For any HSC subject that I am aware of, rhetorical questions are a no. This is because that makes the text seem more like a speech (rhetorical questions are mainly a speech technique) and therefore less formal. Instead, back up your argument with evidence, like statistics or a quote. No open-ended questions causing the reader to think!
    - Whilst your first line is very engaging, it is too informal for an essay. Again, your writing style is perfect for a speech or a magazine article and would engage an audience very well, but as an essay, unfortunately, that doesn't work!
    - No starting a sentence with "but". It was one of the first writing rules I ever learnt in primary school, and I remember reading a sentence beginning with "but" in high school and ended up arguing with my teacher. Basically, you can being with "but", but only if you are able to sophisticatedly continue. I just avoid it because it sounds clunky and as if you're lost for words.
    - Essays are always to the point. No waffling. No asking the reader to think. No creating a pretty scenario to place the reader in. Essays are cold, hard facts, with little insertions of opinion here and there.

    That's all! I was only going to write a sentence but I ended up writing alot! Sorry if what all I said doesn't relate, since all my tips are for a HSC directed essay. Hope it makes sense.
    Martin_SSEDU likes this.

  3. #3
    Member Martin_SSEDU's Avatar
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    Re: essay help

    Definitely think about a formal structure,

    I'd consider reading some of the band 6 essays floating around from previous HSC exams to get a feel as to how exemplar students are writing and the type of language they are using, in fact, you could even get some inspiration from the resources section of this website and read a couple essays to get a solid understanding.
    Hi, my name's Martin and I'm a 2013 Graduate of The King's School having achieved an ATAR of 98.85 and Full Academic Colours. I study at the University of Sydney doing a Bachelor of Commerce (Liberal Studies).

    Currently, I run a tutoring centre together with a team of talented tutors specialising specifically in Mathematics, English and Science. If you're interested you can check our website out at to find out more!

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