I feel so dispondant... (1 Viewer)

Z

Zeppelin

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I feel so dispondent...

I honestly don't know quite why. I got everything I could have asked for: a UAI over 90, and the course I wanted at the university of choice. And yet, when I see how many people on here did well, as well as my friends, and then read that marks were easier to come by this year (2004) more than ever, I can't help but feel like I could have done better.

I did well in Advanced English, ever my Achilles heal, and in fact, it was my second best examination mark. In the SDD test, I missed at least 15 marks because I spent to long on certain questions, yet I still got a mark of 83. I guess I shouldn't be so annoyed about this in particluar, because the extra time I spent on the questions might be the reason I did so well with what I did answer. However, that thought is helpful, but I still can't escape the feeling that I might have done a bit better.

For Mathematics I made some very stupid misatkes that I think would have cost me several marks. I wasn't worried about Maths Ext (dispite getting a years worth of tutoring), and I realised the test was so hard it wouldn't have mattered whether or not I'd studied harder for it (I spent the time on SDD, instead). Chemistry was my lowest mark, when, before I got my marks back, I was sure it would be my highest. I had no problem with Physics, I got a band 6 with a mark of 93.

I don't want to sound egotistical, because I am generally quite modest about these things, but all through school I was the best in everything. There was nothing I couldn't do, and I was always better than everyone at it. It's so hard to accept a UAI as average as 90.95 when I see so many people at the open days with 98+. It's not that I didn't put the work in, hell, I had more than a few 10 hour days leading up to my exams. I worked as hard as the best of you.

I don't go to a private or selective school (although I could have), which I guess is in part the reason I didn't do as well as some of you here. Don't take this the wrong way, I'm sure you all put in a lot of hard work, but it helps when you have excellent teachers acorss the board. I had to teach myself Chemistry, SDD, and English (and I will be ever grateful to the many users on these boards that helped me do that). I did go to a Catholic school, and I came fourth, I believe, in terms of UAI. A lot of teachers congratulated my HSC marks, but then I see so many people have done the same sorts of courses I have done, some even harder. It just makes the UAI feel so empty, because I can no longer fall back on the excuse that "they were really hard subjects".

I don't know. Maybe this sounds like some stupid angsty rant by a moron. I just needed to get it off my chest, and share it with others who might feel the same way. Half the people I know didn't care about school, and those that did got better marks than I did, so it makes things hard to discuss with them.
 
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Blackalicious

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You dont sound arrogant or like a moron. :)
I think the problem is your comparing yourself to others so it makes your achievements look like nothing.
You got the course you wanted thats all that matters.
.
 

joujou_84

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it helps to talk abt things........hope it made u feel betta......who cares wat uai u get as long as u make it into the course u wanted.......if u hadnt then it would be a different story......when uni starts ull feel much betta anyway...its a clean slate and u start afresh.....
 

Captain pi

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It's 'despondent' :p

Joke; I am not that autistic!

Actually, I feel the same way; concentrating on my own marks has made it quite difficult to concentrate on my other studies (I completed some of my HSC in 2004).

I walked out of both of my exams feeling I had got a 195/200 (or thereabouts/thereabove) for 15260/-50; so, when I didn't, it was a bit of a shock and quite upsetting. I thought I had worked hard and that I knew the marking dogma of the HSC inside-out. I also thought that my working and answers in the exam had been the best I had done (although this is usually the case with exams after lengthy preparation). So, I empathize with you. Inspecting a certain L.F.'s results does not help one's self-esteem; and, I assure you, does not help one's academic motivation. (You know who you are!)

I expect that we will both get over it; we will have other things for which we will strive. If I may use a awfully cliché metaphor: at each stepping-stone, we always hope that the next jump will be our best, and judge our achievements on our last jump. But it is important to keep in mind our passage over the stream the stepping-stones are in, and probably better if we judge ourselves by the volume of water we have overcome.

I think you should be content that you worked hard, and happy that you have got into your university course. But, yeah, I know how you feel: a good friend told me that judging oneself by academic performance isn't going to make for a self-content individual. I think that's important, and that is why it is good to have a wholesome life. (Not that I think academia is a small aspect of humanity; au contraire, I think it is one of the greatest, but it is not the only.)

Good luck with your studies, and thanks for sharing your pain.
 

ameh

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aww you can talk to me. take some chocolate or transfer, those feelings are over for good and shouldn't be brooded over, dont waste your time thinking about those eggs that didn't hatch and others hatched. u will hatch one day.
 
Z

Zeppelin

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I'd like to apologise for the bad spelling and typos. Just goes to show what a two and a half month hiatus from school does to you... ;)

Thanks for your replies, especially you and your bad metaphor, pi-man. :p
 

Cactus

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Zeppelin said:
And yet, when I see how many people on here did well, as well as my friends, and then read that marks were easier to come by this year (2004) more than ever, I can't help but feel like I could have done better.

Firstly, the people on here tend to be smart. I mean, why would a dumbarse come on a website about school? Also, the people who say what their UAI was and tell everyone their marks, generally are also the people who did really well. People who maybe didn't go so great don't post their results.

The other thing is, what do you mean marks were easier to come by this year. Thats ridiculous! The UAI system prevents there being such a thing as 'an easy year'
 

thanks hamo

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Look guys, you both have done extreamly well.
Im my group, I was the only one to be accepted into university for a degree. I have many friends enroling in Newstep next year so they can have another go at making their UAI's in the 30's to mid 50's something that can get them closer to their dreams.
Granted, they didnt put much of an effort in, and procrastination seemed to be what STUVAC was all about for them. Im not saying that this is by any means an acheivement, but they tell me for the amount of effort they pout in, they were over the moon with thire marks.
I myself had big expectations, averaging 90 thoughout the whole assessable year. My subjects were scaled down considerably
The result of a solid years work: and glorious UAI of 69.70.
At first, I cried. For me I had done well, and then, SHOT DOWN. I had serious doubts id ever even smell university beyond the information day.
I got into my first preferance: B Science @ University of Newcastle. Even if I had scored as awsomely as you guys had, a 90+ UAI, this would have still been my first preferance, and absolutly stoked with it. The cut off was 70.30.
As long as you guys are happy with what your doing this year, dont feel so pigeon-holed my the rank that somebody you dont even know decides to label you with. What is this number going to mean in a years time?
 
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olay

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thanks_hamo - that is seriously one harsh blow :S i hope you are proud of the effort and stuf you have put in, and that you know you deserve more than you got.

i'm kinda in the same boat as you too zeppelin... and feel like i should be grateful w/ what i got. the only thing that brings some satisfaction in what i ended up with is the fact that i bloody well earned that uai, no matter how 'average' it seems to me. so, i hope you're proud of what you've achieved too.
 
Z

Zeppelin

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I hope that no one takes to heart my comment about having a circa 90 UAI as being average - it's a great achievement - it's just that I feel it's average for me.
 

iambored

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now that you've vented... you don't sound egoistical because it's something that's obviously bothering you and you had to let it out.

if you got into the uni and course you wanted you don't need anymore. that was the point of the hsc. you succeeded in what you wanted at the end of the hsc. good on you.
 

ameh

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you'll always fall short on ur expectations unless you have none.

be content that you've shot up to the moon and landed above the stars and temporarily basked in the moons rays
 

thanks hamo

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zepplin- i understand more what you mean, but, if it makes you feel any better, you beat more than 90% of the state, be proud of that, and kick some ass at uni :)
 
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Zeppelin said:
I honestly don't know quite why. I got everything I could have asked for: a UAI over 90, and the course I wanted at the university of choice. And yet, when I see how many people on here did well, as well as my friends, and then read that marks were easier to come by this year (2004) more than ever, I can't help but feel like I could have done better.

I did well in Advanced English, ever my Achilles heal, and in fact, it was my second best examination mark. In the SDD test, I missed at least 15 marks because I spent to long on certain questions, yet I still got a mark of 83. I guess I shouldn't be so annoyed about this in particluar, because the extra time I spent on the questions might be the reason I did so well with what I did answer. However, that thought is helpful, but I still can't escape the feeling that I might have done a bit better.

For Mathematics I made some very stupid misatkes that I think would have cost me several marks. I wasn't worried about Maths Ext (dispite getting a years worth of tutoring), and I realised the test was so hard it wouldn't have mattered whether or not I'd studied harder for it (I spent the time on SDD, instead). Chemistry was my lowest mark, when, before I got my marks back, I was sure it would be my highest. I had no problem with Physics, I got a band 6 with a mark of 93.

I don't want to sound egotistical, because I am generally quite modest about these things, but all through school I was the best in everything. There was nothing I couldn't do, and I was always better than everyone at it. It's so hard to accept a UAI as average as 90.95 when I see so many people at the open days with 98+. It's not that I didn't put the work in, hell, I had more than a few 10 hour days leading up to my exams. I worked as hard as the best of you.

I don't go to a private or selective school (although I could have), which I guess is in part the reason I didn't do as well as some of you here. Don't take this the wrong way, I'm sure you all put in a lot of hard work, but it helps when you have excellent teachers acorss the board. I had to teach myself Chemistry, SDD, and English (and I will be ever grateful to the many users on these boards that helped me do that). I did go to a Catholic school, and I came fourth, I believe, in terms of UAI. A lot of teachers congratulated my HSC marks, but then I see so many people have done the same sorts of courses I have done, some even harder. It just makes the UAI feel so empty, because I can no longer fall back on the excuse that "they were really hard subjects".

I don't know. Maybe this sounds like some stupid angsty rant by a moron. I just needed to get it off my chest, and share it with others who might feel the same way. Half the people I know didn't care about school, and those that did got better marks than I did, so it makes things hard to discuss with them.
I know how you are feeling. I achieved an UAI of 90.85 and like you, I am not completely satisfied with what I got. The reason why I am not completely satisfied is because I know I did not put 100% effort into my work in year 12. I was lazy and had a tendency to procrastinate throughout the year. At first, I was absolutely ecstatic about my results because I expected an UAI in the 70s. I was expecting an UAI in the 70s because I started studying one week before the HSC started and crammed to the max during the HSC period. Now, I am not so happy. My parents' constant complaints about how I could have done better fill me with regret and make me think "What could I have gotten if I actually worked my ass off? " Another reason why I am not completely satisfied with my results is because I was unable to live up to the expectations of my friends. When I asked one of my friends to guess my UAI, he said 95. Many of my friends expected me to achieve an 95+UAI. And when I read newspaper articles about people who have achieved excellent results in the HSC, I can't help but feel inferior and be filled with regret. But in the end, I got into the course that I wanted.
 

timrie6

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Zeppelin said:
I honestly don't know quite why. I got everything I could have asked for: a UAI over 90, and the course I wanted at the university of choice. And yet, when I see how many people on here did well, as well as my friends, and then read that marks were easier to come by this year (2004) more than ever, I can't help but feel like I could have done better.

I did well in Advanced English, ever my Achilles heal, and in fact, it was my second best examination mark. In the SDD test, I missed at least 15 marks because I spent to long on certain questions, yet I still got a mark of 83. I guess I shouldn't be so annoyed about this in particluar, because the extra time I spent on the questions might be the reason I did so well with what I did answer. However, that thought is helpful, but I still can't escape the feeling that I might have done a bit better.

For Mathematics I made some very stupid misatkes that I think would have cost me several marks. I wasn't worried about Maths Ext (dispite getting a years worth of tutoring), and I realised the test was so hard it wouldn't have mattered whether or not I'd studied harder for it (I spent the time on SDD, instead). Chemistry was my lowest mark, when, before I got my marks back, I was sure it would be my highest. I had no problem with Physics, I got a band 6 with a mark of 93.

I don't want to sound egotistical, because I am generally quite modest about these things, but all through school I was the best in everything. There was nothing I couldn't do, and I was always better than everyone at it. It's so hard to accept a UAI as average as 90.95 when I see so many people at the open days with 98+. It's not that I didn't put the work in, hell, I had more than a few 10 hour days leading up to my exams. I worked as hard as the best of you.

I don't go to a private or selective school (although I could have), which I guess is in part the reason I didn't do as well as some of you here. Don't take this the wrong way, I'm sure you all put in a lot of hard work, but it helps when you have excellent teachers acorss the board. I had to teach myself Chemistry, SDD, and English (and I will be ever grateful to the many users on these boards that helped me do that). I did go to a Catholic school, and I came fourth, I believe, in terms of UAI. A lot of teachers congratulated my HSC marks, but then I see so many people have done the same sorts of courses I have done, some even harder. It just makes the UAI feel so empty, because I can no longer fall back on the excuse that "they were really hard subjects".

I don't know. Maybe this sounds like some stupid angsty rant by a moron. I just needed to get it off my chest, and share it with others who might feel the same way. Half the people I know didn't care about school, and those that did got better marks than I did, so it makes things hard to discuss with them.
man don't dwell on the past, you peformed brilliantly in the hsc
and now the hsc is over, you are in uni- you never need to think about the HSC ever again- and you shouldn't! you have no reason to. its all over and you have achieved all your goals. who cares about a few mistakes in a maths test? even if you didn't make those mistakes you'd still be in exactly the same position as you are now.

From this point on, noone cares about uais. You are back to 0. Now is the time to thouroughly enjoy yourself, not stress about the hsc- that should have finished in november!
 
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pirate

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my advice - stop your crying and get over it. your uai doesn't matter anymore. when you walk into your first lecture, you are equal with everyone else. your uai doen't matter anymore. as long as you got what you wanted then you should be happy. oh btw, don't you know that once you finish your schooling your education really begins?

EDIT: may i stress your uai doesn't count anymore
 

timrie6

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Australian_Idol said:
My parents' constant complaints about how I could have done better fill me with regret and make me think "What could I have gotten if I actually worked my ass off? "
You still got into your course without having to become socially retarded, you should be rejoicing, you achieved your goals nearly effortlessly.
 
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timrie6 said:
You still got into your course without having to become socially retarded, you should be rejoicing, you achieved your goals nearly effortlessly.
Yeah, I guess. My parents are so annoying.
 

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