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At my Wits End (1 Viewer)

MissMacbeth

Mrs. Brandon Bruce Lee
Joined
Apr 26, 2003
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219
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Sydney
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Female
HSC
2003
Ok, this is basically gonna be unreadable but I need to get it off my chest or I'm going to burst.

I really wanna quit everything! My job, my wildlife carers, even school! I am so frustrated at how my fucking life is going right now, I feel like I don't even want to get out of bed anymore.

My usual day consists of this:
I go to school(TAFE/hsc) I come home and the goddamn phone rings for me to either work or rescue some fuckin animal which always takes three hours minimum to collect and take to the vet, and so far I'm about 2 weeks behind in work because of these two stupid obligations!!!!!!
I want to quit tafe simply because it seems a waste of time trying to study and within 5 min of opening a text book that goddamn phone rings and there goes another day!!!

Do you know what the wildlife ppl did the DAY I finished my last HSC exam last year. I am not lying! Litterally the phone was ringing while I drove up the driveway. I didn't even get out of the car when mum came out and said I had to go back into town and pick up a bird to have it euthinased. BREAK IT"S F*CKING NECK!!! I DON'T CARE!!

I realise that I screwed up my hsc last year by stuffing around and procrastinating and I am trying my hardest to put things right this year but everything has to eat my time and make me more of a failure than I already am!!!

I've already told my two obligations I quit and today they both call!!!!! DOES NO ONE LISTEN ANYMORE!~!!
Right now I'm stuck with 4 baby bush rats that need to be fed every 3 hours, so sleep is now a 5th priority, My job seems to call EVERY time I have an exam or an assignment so I always end up handing it in late or basically not doing as well as I should.

I just want to leave my house, not tell anyone where I'm going and never come back!

Now that I have that off my chest, I have to go. The fucking phone is ringing. I can bet who that is!!!!

MM
 

Ziff

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HSC takes priority even above sleep.

You should quit everything - work, relationships, everything for the HSC.
 

cro_angel

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hmmm
theres days where i feel overwhelmed by it all.. but im glad to have such a flexible workplace where i can just write that i cant work for 2 weeks.. and they dont give me a shift (so im not working during exams)
they do call me in like all the time but i only do it when i have time.. or desperately need money lol
once i had an assessment due on a tuesday and i was meant to work monday night.. on sunday im like uhh can i not work tomorrow n they called like 10 ppl to see if someone wanted my shift.. then i didnt have to work
i say quit the wildlife job thing.. that seems like a full time job not a casual thing.. too much commitment during the hsc
umm good luck with it all
 

Loz#1

"03'er"
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Don't let it get on top of you. As someone mentioned before, DON'T answer your phone unless it's a life or death situation.
 

Sarah168

London Calling
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or get an answering machine and only pick up if the person is worthwhile talking to or if (as Loz #1 said) its a life and death situation
 

MissMacbeth

Mrs. Brandon Bruce Lee
Joined
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2003
I feel a little better after having my huge blow up, but I still feel like I'm owned by these things.
The animals are a life and death situation for them, but I've lost so much heart for them, I personally don't give a shit anymore if they die over night. From the time I came home from my drama exam I haven't actually had a good night's sleep or even a day when we only have our pets in the house. I have basically fused.

I've already dug out our old answering machine (needs a power lead) but you guys have no idea how many times that phone rings. On average for the last 4 weeks it's been 25 times. One time I counted 32 phone calls!!!!!

Tomorrow at tafe I don't plan to go home until 5 or 6 *whenever the library shuts* even if I finish my homework and have three hours to go....it's still the fact I can sit there peacefully and not hear that fucking phone ring!

I've got very big signs on each phone saying " I'm not here at all" - see my parents aren't intelligent enough to say I'm not here, they instantly go, 'I'll just get her' so the ppl know I'm there. This is usually what makes me get stuck into all this.
 

AsyLum

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when you start losing heart for the animals you know its time to take a rest, that job is demanding, not only physically but mentally, and i believe you need to get away from that, as it truly reminds you of your hsc, and you are feeling everything is going down the same road...

...take a break from the job, concentrate on studies for now, and then come back to it after you have got your priorities settled, and the time/heart for it.

This next part may sound harsh but: you really aren't doing those animals any favours if your care for them has decreased so much as you have stated. And inversely, the job isn't helping you each time you are called out to go.
 

MiuMiu

Somethin' special....
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Tell these people to call only on your mobile, that there is a personal reason that the phone line can't be held up by calls from them....then don't answer ur fone.
 

MissMacbeth

Mrs. Brandon Bruce Lee
Joined
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Messages
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Location
Sydney
Gender
Female
HSC
2003
Asylum - I totally agree with you.
I do see...now that I've calmed down and don't feel like murdering someone...that not putting full heart into these animals deeply hurts them and affects their survival.
I watch my mum *she does bats as well* feed her baby bat when she;s in a bad mood and he will instantly pick up her pissed off vibe and promptly stuff around with the feeding and get upset....

LOL you'll never guess what happened. Something happened to our phone lines (rats?) and our line was down so no one could call for like a week! IT WAS GREAT!!! It was soooooo peaceful and allowed me to get back on track. I feel better nowand don't feel as owned by 3 jobs at once.
I only have 4 rats now but all are feeding independantly and are awaiting release (in the meantime they;re in our spare bathroom which now resembles a Zoo rainforest exhibit!)

and what makes me feel the best and not feel so behind:
I got 31/35 for my Chemistry exam and I'm 2nd in the class!!!!
Thats damn good for me!!!!!!!!!!!
:)
 

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