Best jokes n sayings?? (1 Viewer)

[benv]

For all you Russell Peters fans out there, this post is to list some of his best sayings & jokes or any that are your favourite ... The sky's the limit

 

[tallkid34]

Be a man!

 

[efhat]

Xobile!!!

 

[Enchantress91]

#1. "My dad thought ponani was a tropical fruit... Hey lady, where's your ponani? My son is at home sick I need ponani right now! Give me two!"

#2. "Be a man. DO the right thing!"

#3. "Confucious say: 'You go to jail, bad boy'"

#4. "Tap Sum Bong sounds cooler than Anthony. Unless you're Anthony by day and TAP SUM BONG by night!"

#5. "firty five dolars... wait one sec I talk to my wife, 1 sec, fank you...You seem like nice guy. I give you best price, firty-four fifty."

I've seen his acts gazillion times...

 

[Omie Jay]

re: indian penises.

God: You will be able to survive in the harshest conditions.
Indian: ..good
God: you will be able to leave this country and go to wherever u want in the world and still be successful.
Indian: ..fantaastik.... what about penises?
God: ..sorry


God: Hey black people come over here a sec, now ppl are gonna be giving you shit for the next 100 years or so, here's a little extra penis. Dont worry, i took it from the indians.


fucking. lol.

 

[Omie Jay]

re: gay indians

dad: Do you know them?
RP: No why would i?
dad: Because THEY are of the gay...and YOU are of the entertainment business.

 

[efhat]

so shaking your hand means 'what the fuck' in italian

Italian in indian restaurant: hey!, (shakes hand)

indian: hey, the buffet is over there, and you watch your language, or someone is gonna get the hurt reeeal bad LOL

 

[Silent_Sniper]

Heres a joke:







Ford!


Want another?



A ford owner with a speeding ticket! (im saying that fords dont go fast)