feedback (1 Viewer)

[hiphophorray123]

hmmm well im kinda not so sure about this paragraph i typed, could ya tell me if it makes sense to you


Deviance is a one of the most difficult concepts to define in sociology as there is no universal agreement on what constitutes deviance. However, a fairly accurate definition of social deviance is provided by Palmer and Humphrey (1924, 01); ‘Deviance implies nonconformity, doing things differently from the everyday routines’. But then this definition gives rise to the question, what is an everyday routine? Is there any such thing as a ‘normal’ everyday routine? Not quite. What is seen as the ‘normal’ thing to do may not be perceived as ‘normal’ to someone else. This is the main problem in defining deviance. For example, a member of the ‘gothic’ culture may see it as ‘normal’ too have numerous body piercings, dress in all black, and have numerous tattoos, now, a member of the ‘hip hop’ culture may see the everyday routines of the ‘goth’ as ‘weird’ and deviant. The member of the ‘hip hop’ culture may find in normal to dress in baggy clothes, colourful attire and graffiti on walls, the ‘goth’ may view this behaviour as deviant. Hence, we have an on-going cycle of conflicting attitudes to the question ‘what is an everyday routine?’

thannks

 

[Cape]

Does it make sense? No, cause I don't do the subject

But you should probably split the paragraph up, because its far too long. Create a new paragraph after you finish talking about Deviance and when you start talking about normal routine. Does that make sense? Probably not

 

[LaraB]

What is this for?

like..coz yeahi t makes sense but the structure may be a bit dodgy and um...unsophisticated i guess..depending on what its for...

 

[hiphophorray123]

major essay, sociology

 

[LaraB]

Deviance is a one of the most difficult concepts to define in sociology as there is no universal agreement on what constitutes deviance. However, a fairly accurate definition of social deviance is provided by Palmer and Humphrey (1924, 01); ‘Deviance implies nonconformity, doing things differently from the everyday routines’. But then this definition gives rise to the question, what is an everyday routine? Is there any such thing as a ‘normal’ everyday routine? Not quite. What is seen as the ‘normal’ thing to do may not be perceived as ‘normal’ to someone else. This is the main problem in defining deviance. For example, a member of the ‘gothic’ culture may see it as ‘normal’ too have numerous body piercings, dress in all black, and have numerous tattoos, now, a member of the ‘hip hop’ culture may see the everyday routines of the ‘goth’ as ‘weird’ and deviant. The member of the ‘hip hop’ culture may find in normal to dress in baggy clothes, colourful attire and graffiti on walls, the ‘goth’ may view this behaviour as deviant. Hence, we have an on-going cycle of conflicting attitudes to the question ‘what is an everyday routine?’

thannks

well i dunno how similar/diff this is from the sociology stuff i do for bus...so i may be wrong...

we were told not to pose more than 1 rhetorical question..2 at most.

i dunno..i think just avoid being too verbose and like....colloquial for want of a better word..like. things like "Deviance is a one of the most difficult concepts to define in sociology as there is no universal agreement on what constitutes deviance. However, a fairly accurate definition of social deviance is provided by Palmer and Humphrey"..

maybe something like i dunno... "Deviance is a difficult concept to define under a sociological school of thought as its characteristics are percieved and interpreted in many ways. One accepted definition of social devince is provided by Palmer and Humphrey..."

just from whath my lecturer said re sociology for our course and essays in general they said avoid stuff like "fairly accurate" coz words like fairly and obvioulsy and stuff like that are "unacademic" coz if it is 'fairly accurate" that'll be evidenced by teh rest of your argument.

And i dunno..especially if your trying to cut down on words to keep under word limit...if you say its difficult to define its a given there is no iuniversal agreement so i guess dont word it as explicitly.

We were also told not to pose and answer questions in an intro, rather to make open ended statements about your following arguments which you'll answer in the body.

It all makes sense to me..i think just like..try to use more sophisticated terminology - its stupid i know coz it shouldnt matter coz the words mean the same thing, but just sounds better. Lol and dont do the raid the thesaurus thing that heapsa people do - lol markers reckon they can always tell

but yeah i could be wrong since im doing stuff on Sociology in reference to the workaplce so it might be different

 

[Shuter]

Stop using so many fucking commas, and the go on to talk about how the majority, or prevailing view could be seen to be the overall "normal" routine in a society, and thus people who vary from this standard may seem normal in their own group, but on the wider society as a whole it is not the case.

 

[William_Lawry]

shut up shuter, u large homosexual

 

[klh]

well, go with the law student...lol. but yeah, dont ask questiosn in essays and dont use colloquial words, ive done so in management foundatiosn and got a fail.
use academic words, yes, do a learning skills unit i reccomend mate.
yeah..after reading all of LaraB's post, yes thats about right, sorry fgor repeating her.
remeber we arent ctiticising you, just helping! i was quite surprsed myself when the lecturer told me this as well since ive dont that since HS but new uni, new ways...
take the suggestions or your marks willg o low, as ive just told you about my situation.

EDIT:
learning skill unit showed us:
a strucutre of a paragrapgh or argument:
-topic sentence
-arguement supported by evidence from academia
-any examples
-restate or move to next arguemnt/linkage.
or i think thats what it is.

 

[hiphophorray123]

yeah i did all that, though i included questions, i always use questions and get high marks so yup thanks anyway