Difference between sophistication and verbosity (1 Viewer)

ncoul

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Hey all, Today, i received an English essay back with a mark of 12/15. This has caused me much grief as I normally get around 14-15. Anyway, the main criticism from a teacher was that my use of verbose language, inhibiting clarity in my essay, brought down my marks. I feel that an essay needs to be sophisticated and the vocabulary stretched. I understand I can change my ways before next year, but I'm greatly discouraged at the moment. I would just like some high English achiever's points of view on this matter. What is the level of formality you personally write with? All the vocabulary used was in the right context and the meaning understood. This may sound conceited, just opinion would appreciated.

Nick
 

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Don't use too much sophisticated langage, but it really depends how your cohort/class is.
If they are all semi-intelligent and you have a teacher that likes you/you like, then use language that you feel comfortable with.

If you don't have a particularly good relationship with the teacher, or your cohort isn't as intelligent, then aim to use language that will make them understand and relate.
 

Shadowdude

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Sophisticated does not mean verbose. Verbose does not mean sophisticated.

Verbose is using big words.

Sophisticated is running a common thread through all your points and having a deep and detailed analysis. It's not about using big words, it's about making big points.
 

ncoul

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Ok, so you wouldn't encourage using these big words?
 

enoilgam

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Ok, so you wouldn't encourage using these big words?
Using big words is fine, but using them just for the sake of using them is not. You want your work to be clear, so the marker only has to read it once. Keeping your sentences short helps as well
 

Shadowdude

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I encourage them if it's your writing style.

My writing style is quite informal, casual and with a hint of verbosity - so it's not unnatural for me to chuck in a big word if I feel like it.

I have a friend whose natural writing style is very formal, definitive and very sophisticated - he loves big words and he uses them a lot. But it works for him because it's part of his natural style, so he knows the ins and outs of it all and when it's appropriate to use a big word or not.


Now what I'd suggest is to just write a story about anything. Don't think about it - just write for about twenty or so minutes.

And then read over it. See what language you use. My EX2 teacher made us do this a few times, she never told me why we did it - but I'm guessing it was to boost our creativity and also see what sort of language came naturally to us.
 

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Don't use too much sophisticated langage, but it really depends how your cohort/class is.
If they are all semi-intelligent and you have a teacher that likes you/you like, then use language that you feel comfortable with.

If you don't have a particularly good relationship with the teacher, or your cohort isn't as intelligent, then aim to use language that will make them understand and relate.
I think this is true. In Advanced, my lexical choice is usually fairly regular, as we get destroyed if we're trying to be too 'showpony.'

In my EX1 class, however, those who don't use sophisticated language seem stupid compared with everyone else.
 

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Can I just say, getting 12/15 consistently is enough to get you a Band 6. It's not a bad mark. :p
 

ncoul

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I think this is true. In Advanced, my lexical choice is usually fairly regular, as we get destroyed if we're trying to be too 'showpony.'

In my EX1 class, however, those who don't use sophisticated language seem stupid compared with everyone else.
I totally agree with that, my EX1 teacher said that the markers feel that we should write ostentatiously, so i assumed the same would be for advanced, but obviously not. Great point.

Can I just say, getting 12/15 consistently is enough to get you a Band 6. It's not a bad mark. :p
I'm normally scraping 14-15, i understand 12's a fine mark, I just have high aspirations.
 

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