Haha being a professional third wheel during high school, i suggest he make his intentions clear from the onset, it sucks being friends with chics you want more from, so crash and burn at the beginning and get on with it and be a friend, or if you're lucky, go for it§oph said:ok. my very best "guy" friend has a real knack for getting himself into situations where he likes a girl and all they want is to be friends. i was the first girl this happened with a couple of years ago unfortunately, so i want to try my best to make things better for him... anyone got any advice?
i completely understand the shy thing - i used to be like that and i still am in a way. but i've learned that being straightforward is just so much easier and gets way better results in the long run the first 4 guys or so that i really liked i was too shy to talk to, but the next one was interested - because i was heaps more direct with him. if your friend is really really shy, the only thing i can suggest is that he simply throws caution to the wind and goes for it. the longer he stays in his shell, the harder it'll be for him to crawl out. but it's something he has to do himself, you can only support him. good luck§oph said:well, wat i mean by "taking things too slow" is that he never appears to be interested in a girl... he's a bit on the shy side and doesnt want to look like an idiot if it turns out theyre not interested. i reckon he needs a bit more "go get em" - if he misses a couple of times, no biggie, in the long run it ll work better? just my opinion
Btw post maker you can find this ladder theory stuff on www.intellectualwhores.com and just look for ladder theory. I feel sorry for this guy his probably done very little wrong and yet his always stuck on the 'friends' side.Skittled said:I'm sure the Ladder Theory disciples will try to enlighten you as to why he ends up just being a friend ...
the ladder theory is a load of crapMarcus Aurelius said:Btw post maker you can find this ladder theory stuff on www.intellectualwhores.com and just look for ladder theory. I feel sorry for this guy his probably done very little wrong and yet his always stuck on the 'friends' side.
no, its mostly me going "i dont like them in *that* way."markmooks said:Are they not expressing an interest in you, or you are eliminating them as potential boyfriends because of your selection criteria? Do you need to go out and find a hot guy at a club and take it from there, avoiding the "we've gone too far as friends to start dating" thing? If that's so you will begin your clubbing pitfalls education soon enough G'luck with that :uhhuh:
i want to be friends with a guy before i go out with them.illuzionz said:i read this sumwhere else. that guys will want to be friends first, and then progress into a serious relationship once they no that hey have someone they can really be with, and be happy.
it sez girls dont see it this way, why not?
seems pretty stupid to 'go out' with someone cos theyre just some hot random.
ps. im talkin in the sense of proper relationships, not just fun, in which case its diff
exactly, its logical right, glad u agree, so then whats with the lets just be friends line?azzie said:i want to be friends with a guy before i go out with them.
kinda logical.
Yes exactly! Thats what i just dont get.......you ask somebody out and they say they hardly know you etc etc, maybe we could go out later on.....adambra said:I've noticed girls say they want to get to know you first before going out, then once you've become friends a further relationship is too risky or too late.
adambra said:I've noticed girls say they want to get to know you first before going out, then once you've become friends a further relationship is too risky or too late.
My brothers, we suffer together...illuzionz said:spot on, first its i wanna get to kno u, then its, oh i know u too well, we cant go out
silly wenches
so its not just me then haha
Hahaha i didnt say i believed it, i doubt anyone would think in the simple terms 'yes they are fuckable' and 'no they arent', i was just referring the site as someone mentioneed lader theory earlier on......azzie said:the ladder theory is a load of crap
its about how you present youself to other people, not about money or such- maybe that theory would work if you were living in miami or some other place like that where people dont give you the time of day if u dont drive a porsche and own 3 houses.
yeah but you never. generally you see someone and expect 'omg i really like this person or whatever'. but that's the kind of love at first sight thing. you never know if if meet some average person and they become the most amazing part of your life. if say you haven't felt this with the people you are with maybe it's the approach or vibe you give.azzie said:no, its mostly me going "i dont like them in *that* way."
and one or two of them are hot and single, its just that i feel anything amazing with them. theres none of the butterflies lovey kinda stuff.
one day dammit, one day.
DragonflyBlade21: A woman has a close male friend. This means that he is probably interested in her, which is why he hangs around so much. She sees him strictly as a friend. This always starts out with, you're a great guy, but I don't like you in that way. This is roughly the equivalent for the guy of going to a job interview and the company saying, You have a great resume, you have all the qualifications we are looking for, but we're not going to hire you. We will, however, use your resume as the basis for comparison for all other applicants. But, we're going to hire somebody who is far less qualified and is probably an alcoholic. And if he doesn't work out, we'll hire somebody else, but still not you. In fact, we will never hire you. But we will call you from time to time to complain about the person that we hired.
aww poor diddumsDeus said:The thing with me is that im not like shy or anything when it comes to that, but i actually would like to know a girl a bit before i make a move.....i dont want any nasty suprises do i? But i always end up becomming pretty good friends with the girl, and then she says she wants to keep it like that (as something more may ruin the friendship.....)
*sighs*
Dreamerish is always giving out invaluable advice on love and relationships. She is like a bos version of dollydoctor. errr...not that i've read dolly magazine *runs*.Dreamerish*~ said:Is that a little contradictory? He likes the girls, they just want to be friends. But he takes things too slow and sets him up as only a friend?
Let him experience the crapness (or wonderfulness) of love. He lives, he learns. You can't mother his relationships for him.