Bart: Hey Lis, you still upset about that jazz guy? Well, I believe that when you die, you can come back as whatever you like. I'll be a butterfly.
Lisa: How come?
Bart: 'Cause... nobody ever suspects the butterfly!
(The view changes to Springfield Elementary School burned to rubble)
Principal Skinner: I didn't burn down the school! It was the butterfly I tell you! The butterfly!
Chief Wiggum: He's crazy boys, get the taser.
Bart: [as a butterfly, holding a can of gas] Mwa ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
<The Simpsons, Chief Wiggum and the "Alligator keeper from Australia" praise the programs on NBC after Marge uses knowledge acquired watching a NBC show to save Homer from a charging Rhino>
Homer: Oh Marge, you saved me!
Bart: Wow, you are so much cooler than Milhouse's mom!
Wiggum: Yeah, way to channel that rage, Simpson.
Lisa: How'd you know your plan would work, Mom?
Marge: Glad you asked, honey. Well, I was watching "Dateline," and Stone Phillips said SUVs always roll over when you turn sharply. And the gas tanks explode at the drop of a hat.
Zookeeper: And she also knew that if a rhino sees a flame, he'll instinctively try to put it out.
Marge: Stone Phillips again.
Homer: Is there anything that guy doesn't know?
Zookeeper: Boy, that Stone Phillips sounds like quite a bloke. What television network is he on?
Bart: Why, NBC, of course.
Lisa: NBC has lots of great shows, and their news and sports coverage can't be beat.
Wiggum: Do you think there's anything great on NBC right now?
Homer: Oh, I'm sure of it.
Marge: But there's only one way to find out.
<cut to the closing credits>
Homer <voice-over>: I'd like to read the following statement, but I do so under ... <sound of gun cocking>... my own free will. It has come to my attention that NBC sucks. I apologize for misleading you and urge you to watch as many Fox shows as possible. So in summary, NBC - bad. Fox - good. <very softly> CBS great.
<sound of gunshot, followed by a thud. The Gracie Studios logo appears, accompanied by three gunshots>
Homer: Don't you have school?
Bart: Don't you have work?
Homer: Ahh, Touché.