KimmorleyKiller
Member
- Joined
- Feb 3, 2006
- Messages
- 75
- Gender
- Male
- HSC
- 2007
Hey guys,
Ive commited the cardinal sin by leaving a pre-lim draft i have to hand in tomorrow until the last minute...its supposed to be a creative writing story about change but its really crap and i cant finish it! can someone help me out?
Quote:
I'm on top of the world – D1
I attempted to drown out the crowd, i tried not to think about the negatives, only what i had to do to get the ball over and pick up those precious two points. From the corner of my eye i could see rampid fans waving and screaming from the other side of the fence. I closed my eyes, ran in and kicked the ball...
I could tell from the sudden eruption of sound, like water rushing through a drain pipe that it had gone between the posts, my teammates ran over in a delirious state of ecstasy, cameras and film crew were everywhere, the fans were jumping the fence to shake my hand, the media were all rushing in to try and interview me first, it was barely controlled chaos, all over one kick.
The next week was a blur, every newspaper had my photo on the back, every television set had my face on the screen, everyone wanted to talk me. I was cutting deals with television networks and clothing company's, i even had my head on the nutrigrain!. That weekend i received a call from my manager, the club was offering me a record breaking new deal, one that would let me and my family live in luxury until the end of our days. I was on top of the world.
That was also the night i met Judy. She wasn't like other girls, she was, how do i say, skeptical. She wasn't' throwing herself on me, she wasn't vying for my attention with long eyelashes and lavish smiles, to her i was just a regular guy trying to have a good time with some mates. I saw her again the next day, and the next....
A year later i was at the airport with my soon-to-be wife, getting ready to board the plane to London for a house hunting trip before the new season started. Whilst trying to get down as much breakfast as i could before the flight, i was recognised by a couple of kids “Hey man, its him! its him!” i heard one of them whisper. After signing a few autographs i walked over to the vending machine to buy a coke, when i felt a sharp pain in my chest. It passed so i continued my journey when it hit back again, this time, twice as severe. I doubled over, not able to breath...and i passed out.
I woke up in hospital, surrounded by cold, hard, whirring machines with flashing lights. Two doctors were in the room, one was reading over notes by the end of my bed, (an old man with a receding hairline), and the other was a young man, standing to my left looking at me inquisitively “how do you feel?” He asked me. “Not great, how should i feel?” i replied with slight resignation. The doctor explained what was wrong with me, and the worst thing about it was that it took completely by surprise. I did all the right things, id never smoked, i was fit, i was healthy, no-one else in my family had it but apparently lung cancer is like that. It can just happen.
That next morning i went into surgery, i don't remember that much about it, i know my family was there and Judy was crying, then waking up a week later in incredible pain and seeing the expression on the doctors face, Straight away i knew the news wasn't good.
Its been three years since i was diagnosed with lung cancer...
It only has to be around 700 words, but ive got a massive brain freeze cause im starting to panic...
Cheers, KK
Ive commited the cardinal sin by leaving a pre-lim draft i have to hand in tomorrow until the last minute...its supposed to be a creative writing story about change but its really crap and i cant finish it! can someone help me out?
Quote:
I'm on top of the world – D1
I attempted to drown out the crowd, i tried not to think about the negatives, only what i had to do to get the ball over and pick up those precious two points. From the corner of my eye i could see rampid fans waving and screaming from the other side of the fence. I closed my eyes, ran in and kicked the ball...
I could tell from the sudden eruption of sound, like water rushing through a drain pipe that it had gone between the posts, my teammates ran over in a delirious state of ecstasy, cameras and film crew were everywhere, the fans were jumping the fence to shake my hand, the media were all rushing in to try and interview me first, it was barely controlled chaos, all over one kick.
The next week was a blur, every newspaper had my photo on the back, every television set had my face on the screen, everyone wanted to talk me. I was cutting deals with television networks and clothing company's, i even had my head on the nutrigrain!. That weekend i received a call from my manager, the club was offering me a record breaking new deal, one that would let me and my family live in luxury until the end of our days. I was on top of the world.
That was also the night i met Judy. She wasn't like other girls, she was, how do i say, skeptical. She wasn't' throwing herself on me, she wasn't vying for my attention with long eyelashes and lavish smiles, to her i was just a regular guy trying to have a good time with some mates. I saw her again the next day, and the next....
A year later i was at the airport with my soon-to-be wife, getting ready to board the plane to London for a house hunting trip before the new season started. Whilst trying to get down as much breakfast as i could before the flight, i was recognised by a couple of kids “Hey man, its him! its him!” i heard one of them whisper. After signing a few autographs i walked over to the vending machine to buy a coke, when i felt a sharp pain in my chest. It passed so i continued my journey when it hit back again, this time, twice as severe. I doubled over, not able to breath...and i passed out.
I woke up in hospital, surrounded by cold, hard, whirring machines with flashing lights. Two doctors were in the room, one was reading over notes by the end of my bed, (an old man with a receding hairline), and the other was a young man, standing to my left looking at me inquisitively “how do you feel?” He asked me. “Not great, how should i feel?” i replied with slight resignation. The doctor explained what was wrong with me, and the worst thing about it was that it took completely by surprise. I did all the right things, id never smoked, i was fit, i was healthy, no-one else in my family had it but apparently lung cancer is like that. It can just happen.
That next morning i went into surgery, i don't remember that much about it, i know my family was there and Judy was crying, then waking up a week later in incredible pain and seeing the expression on the doctors face, Straight away i knew the news wasn't good.
Its been three years since i was diagnosed with lung cancer...
It only has to be around 700 words, but ive got a massive brain freeze cause im starting to panic...
Cheers, KK