JOHN DONNE SPEECH HELP! Someone tell me how good my speech is? (1 Viewer)

hayabusaboston

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the question was "Choose one of donnes poems and analyse the way in which context, ideas and values are explored in the poem"
I chose "The apparition"
This poem explores the emotions of a jilted lover, rejected for someone who, in the eyes of the writer, is obviously inferior. Although many poems have been written about rejection, most of them end with the lover pleading with the loved to accept him again. However, in John Donne’s “The Apparition”, that idea is being flipped on its head- by the end he is not pleading to be welcomed back into the arms of his beloved, but is in fact gloating - she made a bad decision, and now she has to live with it!
The special thing about “The Apparition” which is different to most of Donne’s other poems, is that it doesn’t use any extended metaphors known as conceits. This has the effect of producing a more raw and realistic context, one which can readily be appreciated by the contemporary reader. Unlike other Donne poems, which mix emotion with rational thought, this is a rush of almost pure emotion. The ideas of romance it explores are part of a universal framework which all humans can experience themselves and relate to, thus the poem strikes more deeply into the moral compass of the modern reader. The context of writing is not delineated from the 21st century, as moral values and response carry forth through time as inherent facets of the human condition. The supreme realism in “The Apparition” also blurs the very definition of Donne’s religious context with the modern one,
Donne’s use of direct address further enhances his connection with the reader, giving the reader an unprecedented position in the emotional lattice of the poem, right in the centre of the action. Donne presents his poem through the reader himself, and thus the reader is able to more deeply appreciate the context of Donne as he is forced into it for himself by Donne’s skilful manipulation of direct address as a poetic device.
Over the course of the poem the tension is built up steadily, but there is a dramatic change in the last four lines, where the tension is held but the poem becomes reflective rather than vituperative[aggressive and cursing].
Donne also employs the use of imagery in the poem. An example of this is “feigned vestal…”” which is a reference to feigned virginity, representing the selfish and uncouth behaviour of his lover towards him and for her new man. This in turn promotes ideas in the readers mind of romantic unfaithfulness, directly related to Donne’s intention in the construction of the poem. This also brings up the question of the prominence of unfaithfulness in Donne’s time, further enhancing the connection between connubial contexts of the 17th century vs the 21st century.
Overall the poem also comprises heavy melodrama, which is evident in lines such as “when by thy scorn, o’ murdress, I am dead”. This gives the poem a heavy weighting, that bears upon the values and morals associated with reprieval. Donne also clearly demonstrates the inadequacy of her new lover, both sexually and emotionally: Will... think thou call'st for more, and in false sleepe will from thee shrinke..." Not only is the lover too tired for any more, but he is unwilling to listen to her problems. This is a universal notion amongst men, who often have a lack of enthusiasm towards the problems of women. Another line describes, A veryer ghost than I - ie, she will finally understand how he feels, to be rejected in such a way.
Thus donne’s poem “The Apparition” can be seen to be comprised of a variety of ideas and values which underpin a universal framework of communication amongst the sexes, which is applicable not only in the context of 17th century England but also the 21st century world.
 

yasminee96

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How long does your speech need to be? This seems extremely short
also, i do think you need a LOT more :|
don't be toooo formal, it's not an essay and you don't want to bore the audience
keep in mind it is a speech - rhetorical questions and other speech techniques would probably help you haha!
values: speak about how in his time (renaissance) the male dominance over women was pretty evident, and it is VERY clear in the apparition lol.
Try speaking about the value for women who were pure. "feign'd vestal" suggests she's a woman who falsely claims that she is a virgin
Perhaps bring up the value of manhood - he's definitely degraded by this lady turning him down where he claims he is "dead" in the first line, representing the impact. This whole poem is his way of saying "how dare you turn me down". Here would be a cool way to use something like "if a chick turned you down, how would you react? Would you threaten her to death?" or something along those lines to represent a change in values for reputation and pride from renaissance to now. CONNECT WITH YOUR AUDIENCE.

A lot of context is spoken through values. But something you could add is the fact that there is no enjambent, there's a rhyme scheme, nested couplets, and even a meter. This guy is so impacted by his context and it's dogma of a metaphysical poet, that even when he feels like murdering someone, where he's extremely pissed, he manages to flawlessly use all these techniques that are expected of a metaphysical poet.


You need to go much deeper, have a lot more, and definitely connect with the audience. If someone were to read this to you i guarantee you'll fall asleep haha.
 

hayabusaboston

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REWRITTEN SPEECH: CRITIQUE PLZ?? Btw its 800+ words, we need a 5 min speech, so I think it works quite well.

John Donne’s 17th Century poem “The Apparition” explores the emotions of a jilted lover, rejected for someone who, in the eyes of the writer, is obviously inferior. It essentially focuses on the values of love and passion, and portrays them through the experience of Donne in his poem, wherein he scolds his lover on her betrayal of him and warns her of the consequences. It also employs a contextual chiaroscuro that deeply convey powerful emotions to the contemporary reader.
The special thing about “The Apparition” which is different to most of Donne’s other poems, is that it doesn’t use any extended metaphors known as conceits. This has the effect of producing a more raw and realistic context, one which can readily be appreciated by the contemporary reader. Unlike other Donne poems, which mix emotion with rational thought, this is a rush of almost pure emotion. The ideas of romance it explores are part of a universal framework which all humans can experience themselves and relate to, thus the poem strikes more deeply into the moral and emotional compass of the modern reader. The raw emotional expression is what is associated with the Renaissance context in which Donne lived. The context gives hints of influence in the middle lines of the poem, “In a cold quicksilver swear wilt lye”, which is a reference to the use of mercury as a Renaissance cure for the sexually transmitted disease Syphilis. The context of writing is not delineated from the 21st century, as moral values and psychological response, such as love, anger and betrayal, carry forth through time as inherent facets of the human condition. The Renaissance context is closely felt in the contemporary context through the raw and heartfelt expression of emotion, yet it delineates itself from the 21st century through the description of the “Cold quicksilver sweat”, giving an indication of its historical place.
Donne’s use of direct address further enhances his connection with the reader, giving the reader an unprecedented position in the emotional lattice of the poem, right in the centre of the action. Donne presents his poem through the reader himself, and thus the reader is able to more deeply appreciate the context of Donne as he is forced into it for himself by Donne’s skilful manipulation of direct address as a poetic device.
Over the course of the poem the tension is built up steadily, but there is a dramatic change in the last four lines, where the tension is held but the poem becomes reflective rather than vituperative.
Donne also employs the use of imagery in the poem. An example of this is “feigned vestal…”” which is a reference to feigned virginity, representing the selfish and uncouth behaviour of his lover towards him and for her new man. This in turn promotes ideas in the readers mind of romantic unfaithfulness, directly related to Donne’s intention in the construction of the poem. This also brings up the question of the prominence of unfaithfulness in Donne’s time, further enhancing the connection between connubial contexts of the 17th century vs the 21st century.
Overall the poem also comprises heavy melodrama, which is evident in lines such as “when by thy scorn, o’ murdress, I am dead”. This gives the poem a heavy weighting, that bears upon the values and morals associated with reprieval. Donne also clearly demonstrates the inadequacy of her new lover, both sexually and emotionally:” Will... think thou call'st for more, and in false sleepe will from thee shrinke..." Not only is the lover too tired for any more, but he is unwilling to listen to her problems. This is a universal value amongst men, who often have a lack of enthusiasm towards the problems of women. Another line describes, A veryer ghost than I - ie, she will finally understand how he feels, to be rejected in such a way. The condemning and harsh nature of Donne’s words indicates Donne focuses on the idea of Death being a major component of punishment in his context. The lines “I had rather though shouldst painfully repent, than by my threatenings still rest innocent.” Use a powerful adverb of “Powerfully”. This adverb creates a sense of double suffering, as, in the 17th century at least, connubial and/or romantic condemnation and punishment either had a strongly physical or strongly emotional basis. The word itself indicates severity of the notion, thus one is able to deduce that Donne was wishing upon his lover a strongly physical and emotional suffering, in order to exact his revenge, another universal human value, which is wrought into the very essence of every human being, and as can be seen in “the apparition”, the essence of John Donne.
Thus donne’s poem “The Apparition” can be seen to be comprised of a variety of ideas and values which underpin a universal framework of communication amongst the sexes, which is applicable not only in the context of 17th century England but also the 21st century world.
 

Spiritual Being

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Excellent work!

Great speech.

Eloquent, well-written, well-supported and you have fundamentally utilized textual evidence!
 

madharris

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REWRITTEN SPEECH: CRITIQUE PLZ?? Btw its 800+ words, we need a 5 min speech, so I think it works quite well.
It looks more like an essay than a speech

Add a sentence at the beginning to captivate your audience, possibly start with a verb or a question
Use rhetorical questions thoughout your speech to challenge the audience/marker to think about the notions that you're suggesting
Try to involve your audience a bit, maybe be like "member's of the audience..."
Talk with lots of expression so you're not a robot
Use lots of eye contact, looking up every once in a while isn't good enough, try to memorise your speech as much as you can so you don't have to rely so heavily on your palm cards
 

hayabusaboston

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It looks more like an essay than a speech

Add a sentence at the beginning to captivate your audience, possibly start with a verb or a question
Use rhetorical questions thoughout your speech to challenge the audience/marker to think about the notions that you're suggesting
Try to involve your audience a bit, maybe be like "member's of the audience..."
Talk with lots of expression so you're not a robot
Use lots of eye contact, looking up every once in a while isn't good enough, try to memorise your speech as much as you can so you don't have to rely so heavily on your palm cards
Its supposed to be an essay guys... the teachers literally are making us "speak an essay", we're not even going to be marked on speech and fluency and all that. Teacher said verbatim "You're just speaking an essay on John Donne"
 

Absolutezero

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Bold means delete
Italics means reword
Underline means look at the notes
The notes mean whatever they say they mean


REWRITTEN SPEECH: CRITIQUE PLZ?? Btw its 800+ words, we need a 5 min speech, so I think it works quite well.

John Donne’s 17th Century poem “The Apparition” explores the emotions of a jilted lover, rejected for someone who, in the eyes of the writer, is obviously inferior. It essentially focuses on the values of love and passion, and portrays them through the experience of Donne in his poem, wherein he scolds his lover on her betrayal of him and warns her of the consequences. It also employs a contextual chiaroscuro that deeply convey powerful emotions to the contemporary reader.
Lowercase Century
Combine remaining first and second sentence
Work out what you're arguing
State what in the text provides those ideas
What emotions is it conveying
Why is it important that it is dissected from a contemporary perspective
How does what you're saying relate to your argument


The special thing about “The Apparition” which is different to most of Donne’s other poems, is that it doesn’t use any extended metaphors known as conceits. This has the effect of producing a more raw and realistic context, one which can readily be appreciated by the contemporary reader. Unlike other Donne poems, which mix emotion with rational thought, this is a rush of almost pure emotion. The ideas of romance it explores are part of a universal framework which all humans can experience themselves and relate to, thus the poem strikes more deeply into the moral and emotional compass of the modern reader. The raw emotional expression is what is associated with the Renaissance context in which Donne lived. The context gives hints of influence in the middle lines of the poem, “In a cold quicksilver swear wilt lye”, which is a reference to the use of mercury as a Renaissance cure for the sexually transmitted disease Syphilis. The context of writing is not delineated from the 21st century, as moral values and psychological response, such as love, anger and betrayal, carry forth through time as inherent facets of the human condition. The Renaissance context is closely felt in the contemporary context through the raw and heartfelt expression of emotion, yet it delineates itself from the 21st century through the description of the “Cold quicksilver sweat”, giving an indication of its historical place.
First line should be your argument, not a technique or piece of evidence
Move what you need to to make an argument
You shouldn't be stating what it doesn't do, you should be stating what it does do
Condense context section
Why is context important to your argument
What are the actual literary techniques being used in those quotes, not just the response it causes

Donne’s use of direct address further enhances his connection with the reader, giving the reader an unprecedented position in the emotional lattice of the poem, right in the centre of the action. Donne presents his poem through the reader himself, and thus the reader is able to more deeply appreciate the context of Donne as he is forced into it for himself by Donne’s skilful manipulation of direct address as a poetic device.
Over the course of the poem the tension is built up steadily, but there is a dramatic change in the last four lines, where the tension is held but the poem becomes reflective rather than vituperative. Donne also employs the use of imagery in the poem. An example of this is “feigned vestal…”” which is a reference to feigned virginity, representing the selfish and uncouth behaviour of his lover towards him and for her new man. This in turn promotes ideas in the readers mind of romantic unfaithfulness, directly related to Donne’s intention in the construction of the poem. This also brings up the question of the prominence of unfaithfulness in Donne’s time, further enhancing the connection between connubial contexts of the 17th century vs the 21st century.
What is your argument
How does Donne present the poem through the reader
What is the dramatic change
Why is anything here important to whatever your thesis is.
What quotes are you using as evidence. Put them in
Don't start with a technique, especially one without evidence
You need to explain much earlier on why context is at all important

Overall the poem also comprises heavy melodrama, which is evident in lines such as “when by thy scorn, o’ murdress, I am dead”. This gives the poem a heavy weighting, that bears upon the values and morals associated with reprieval. Donne also clearly demonstrates the inadequacy of her new lover, both sexually and emotionally:” Will... think thou call'st for more, and in false sleepe will from thee shrinke..." Not only is the lover too tired for any more, but he is unwilling to listen to her problems. This is a universal value amongst men, who often have a lack of enthusiasm towards the problems of women. Another line describes, A veryer ghost than I - ie, she will finally understand how he feels, to be rejected in such a way. The condemning and harsh nature of Donne’s words indicates Donne focuses on the idea of Death being a major component of punishment in his context. The lines “I had rather though shouldst painfully repent, than by my threatenings still rest innocent.” Use a powerful adverb of “Powerfully”. This adverb creates a sense of double suffering, as, in the 17th century at least, connubial and/or romantic condemnation and punishment either had a strongly physical or strongly emotional basis. The word itself indicates severity of the notion, thus one is able to deduce that Donne was wishing upon his lover a strongly physical and emotional suffering, in order to exact his revenge, another universal human value, which is wrought into the very essence of every human being, and as can be seen in “the apparition”, the essence of John Donne.
Don't start with a quote. I have no idea where your paragraphs are starting and ending
What technique is used
Why is inadequacy important
Your sexism is creeping in
What are the techniques being used
Powerful adverb is weak language

Thus donne’s poem “The Apparition” can be seen to be comprised of a variety of ideas and values which underpin a universal framework of communication amongst the sexes, which is applicable not only in the context of 17th century England but also the 21st century world.
How
What are the ideas and values
 

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