Manipulative best friends (1 Viewer)

[RabbitRabbit]

I've seen this happening repeatedly between two people who formed a close relationship of 10+ years, where A treats B like shit but B covers it with denial and tolerates it, so as not to jeopardize their friendship. In this situation I would normally think B is an idiot for putting up with this, and I would try to convince her, "Ditch A, you deserve better than the shit she throws at you".

But having this happen to me was like a slap of reality. I simply can't take my own advice. I met my bestfriend when we were 8 years old. We went to primary and high school together and she lives a 2 minutes walk from my house. Since going to Uni, we havnt seen for a while but over past year I've noticed her apathetic approach to people around her. Our conversations have then fallen from hollow with empty smiles to effortless with no meaning. When she is bored, she would drop by my house, rummage through things. At this point, I will ignore her and she would get irritated with me. And it would be me who would finally need to reconcile the 'problem'. Most of our 'arguments' or rather her tantrums would be similar to this. Like 'B' in my first scenario, I've fallen in the same sort of denial that we're still like kids, and that nothing has really changed. Regrettably, the truth is everything but.

I hate her to some extent for making me feel so responsible for her moods and not putting enough effort in, when mutual respect has disintegrated. I now realize now how difficult it is to end a friendship with so much past and memories attatched to it. Having grown accustomed to her being around, she is almost like a sister to me. I still think denial and persistence seems an easier option that confrontation and if not more pain.
Can anyone share their experiences so I can feel less crap right now?

 

[timlay]

Re: Manipulative bestfriends

well i treat my close friend like shit. i don't know why.

maybe shes a girl. and shes taken by my best friend. and its funny bagging her out about her hairy arms..... *shrugs* maybe its just the fact that we've been friends for pretty long that we bag each other out anyway.


i also have another best friend who has drifted away , stolen by my other friends.

so now im lonely.

 

[vulgarfraction]

Re: Manipulative bestfriends

I'm the person who treats a few people like shit.... and then back up to them for a hug. Not often though..

I'm just moodswingy. And I don't do it to lots of people. One or two, and then some I'm bad to and then feel guilty.

Anyway, what you do is be a bitch back to her. =(

 

[Davriel]

I am one the most consumate manipulators, and that is no mere boasting. I have manipulated friends, family, rivals, employers, associates and others with only minimal guilt. However, I have also been bagged on by friends, family and rivals alike, so I know both sides of the story.

Generally, most of the bagging is just mucking about, and in some ways it's a game, and in my case, that is why I manipulate people, for the love of the game rather than any goal.

However, if you are truly being taken advantage of you will notice it, but you may have become too timid to do anything about. You can either fight it, be assertive and challenge it, be manipulative and turn the tables, or ditch your friends.

 

[Davriel]

Life's about fun, you really shouldn't manipulate or use people.

in fact it openly disgusts me that people like you exist.

You should be bloody ashamed of yourself.

You are naive. People like me have existed since the dawn of man. We are the leaders, the thinkers and more often than not, the puppeteers.

Not all my manipulations are 'evil' or 'disgusting'. Sometimes I have manipulated people to help them see truth. Such as instead of telling a cousin that his girlfriend is cheating, I carefully steered him to catching them in the act.

I have spent the majority of my life in the most ultimate manipulation of all. I make people see me as a wretch, something to be crushed. Their reactions reveal what they really are to me, sometimes for good, oft for ill.

And as for being ashamed for myself? What should I be ashamed for? The fact that I know how to use others if need be? I don't always do it, and I enjoy seeing the ones I love make their own decisions. Besides, manipulation is not always cloak and daggers. Sometimes love can be a powerful tool, othertimes jealousy, hate etc. How about you take a long hard look at yourself and the impact you have on the lives of others before you condemn me, worm.

 

[AlleyCat]

I'm pretty certain that this is just another attempt by Argonaut at being "Machiavellian"...

 

[Davriel]

Oh Sweet Iago, show me your skills. You are not what you are, wearing your heart on your sleeve! We will be tenderly lead by the nose as asses are!

Out of my goodness and innocence make the net that shall enmesh us all!

Well my Thespian friend, next time you feel like quoting Shakespeare, and Othello particularly, remember I am no Iago. For starters, using manipulation for petty things such as revenge and lust is completely and utterly useless. Enjoying our little debate? I am.

 

[katykins]

Life's about fun, you really shouldn't manipulate or use people.

in fact it openly disgusts me that people like you exist.

You should be bloody ashamed of yourself.

HAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHA.
































never cease to amaze me.

 

[AlleyCat]

HAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHA.


never cease to amaze me.

Whut's your problem with him, anyway?

 

[katykins]

Alley, she can't deal with sharing the affections of her friends because she's a psychotic control freak, and when I try to spend time with them or compete for their time she LOSES it.

qft.

 

[AlleyCat]

Oh.

And Alby?

 

[Davriel]

I seem to have inspired a fair bit of contention in this thread...brings a warm fuzzy feeling to my heart. And by the way, I in no way beleive I'm something particularly special, as I don't have quite a large enough ego for that. I've met others who are far better at manipulation then I am, and my best course of action has always been to stay a fair bit out of their way.

Oh, and JFK (member, not the late American president) I was mortally wounded by your vile and wicked insult. I have never before heard such a low disgusting term such as 'shitfuck'. Okay, I'm lying through my teeth. I've made better insults. Miles, you're actually worth the effort of insulting, JFK, go outside and let the adults play.

 

[Davriel]

JFK, your insults still lack are much like the an axe to the face, but a stroke that misses. If you want to insult, first you will need to know me, and I doubt anyone, including myself, knows me. An insult only hurts when you strike a nerve, so good luck trying to even touch me. By the way, I am well aware I am quite wordy, but that happens to be an idiosyncracy that I really don't care about. Now, if you have anything actually relevant to this thread add it. To be honest, you bore me.

 

[Davriel]

Yeah so reply to my posts with another essay about it.


You are HEAPS shit.

You fail internets and life.


End yrself.

Tell you what, when you come up with a decent insult, post it, and see how I react. My weaknesses tend to be commitment issues, the inability to see anything in life as nothing but a game, and my complete and utter lack of care for the majority of humanity. There, I even gave you ammo. Have fun, dear child.

 

[Davriel]

ooooo....So close to actually irritating me, but no, you failed. I faced a couple of years of persecution so the insult 'blow your dad' is old. (Yawns). Tell me, does the fact that you're a child compared to the assholes I know mean anything. Nothing you can say is going to annoy me. Actually, why not talk to Miles, he actually annoyed me. You just make me laugh. I probaby should tell you at this point I've always enjoyed getting ripped off, makes me laugh.

 

[Ennaybur]

"lol look at how kewlz i am with my non caring about life and people. i am teh MANIPULATORZ"

 

[katykins]

ooooo....So close to actually irritating me, but no, you failed. I faced a couple of years of persecution so the insult 'blow your dad' is old. (Yawns). Tell me, does the fact that you're a child compared to the assholes I know mean anything. Nothing you can say is going to annoy me. Actually, why not talk to Miles, he actually annoyed me. You just make me laugh. I probaby should tell you at this point I've always enjoyed getting ripped off, makes me laugh.

essay it up again you gigantic crantard.

 

[katykins]

um, that was me...brogan

 

[Davriel]

Miles, I may not like you, but I respect you. But right now I'm too busy making this pathetic JFK waste her time trying to insult me. Oh, and Katykins, please, I don't know you and I like to think that some people know better than to stay out of arguments they're not invited to.

 

[Ennaybur]

lol... her