ok mr speedy. you (and all the other guys) better appreciate this.
straight out of this month's cosmo, the oral sex workshop.
FOR HIM: (hers'll be typed later)
the lowdown on going down on her... by lesbian sexpert misty bennett.
1.
get ready
if you're a newcomer to all this, ur probably feeling nervous. this is normal., even i, the lesbian enrique iglesias, felt overwhelmed the first tim ei came face to face with a woman's genitals. so oget comfy with these fail-safe warm up techniques.
- turn off phones & hang a DND sign on the door.
- warm up th room so u don't die of oxygen deprivation beneath an uncooperative doona.
- choose lighting that lets u see what ur doing, but not so she feels like she's visiting the gyno.
- make sure neither of u are in positions that'll get umcomfy after 5mins.
- show ur enthusiasm: tell her u can't wait to bury ur head between her thighs (she'll be eating out of ur hands before u make a single move)
CRITICAL TIP: make her comfy by suggestng the aim is enjoyment rather than orgasm. sometimes she won't come, but that doens't mean she won' t get something amazing out of the experience.
2.
ask what she likes.
all women are different. even if u have plenty of oral experience, don't assume that because ur last gf liked it slow & steady, ur new partner will.
- honest and inviting works best with sex chat. try, "i'd love to go down on you, but am worried i won't get it right., can u give me some pointers?" dont laugh if she responds with instructions, diagrams and a powerpoint demonstration. this is vital info, u should be taking notes!
- dont keep pressuring her for info if she's shy., tell her any time she wants to give u feedback is fine by u.,
3.
get to know her
guys are often teased abt their inablility to find the clitoris, so use these preliminary proceedings to check out ur partner's most intimate geographical regions:
- encourage ur gf to lie with her legs spread a comfy distance apart
- offer her additional pillows in case she likes to watch, being able to see eachother & make eye contact will also help keep the 2 of u feeling connected.
- lay on ur belly with your face between her thighs,. if ur neck gets cramped, try kneeling alongside her and descending from above.
- if ur on your oral L-plates, u'll probably be tempted to rush. don't. there is a time & place for quickies, this is not it.
- anticipation is a powerful aphrodisiac. tease ur lover by licking & kissing her inner thighs, nibbling ur way around the outside of her genital area, and brushing ur cheek against her pubic hair.
CRITICAL TIP: FORGET EVERYTHING YOU EVER LEARNED IN PORNOS. if they show oral sex at all, it's usually short and clinical.
4.
the first long licks:
once you've given your partner a lengthy tease, the time has come to move onto 2nd/3rd base. this is where things get really interesting.....
- start by using ur hands to gently part her pubic hair. if she's gone brazilian, separate her lips slightly so the clitoral area is on full display.
- the best way to get the ball rolling s a long, slow lick which starts near the mouth of the vagina and goes all the way up to the top of the clitoral hood.
- use medium pressure & a flat, relaxed tongue. ther'es nothing worse than being jabbed with a hard, pointy tongue tip. apart from making u seem reluctant, it can be painful.
- after a bunch of long,luscuious licks, try pressing your tongue flat against her clitoral area & shaking it ever so slightly.
- light flicks over the clit can work wonders, but DON'T USE TEETH.
CRITICAL TIP: don't be afraid to use your nose, it's great for parting hair, and nuzzling her cleft, lips & clit. just make sure it's not blocked. you'll need it to breathe!
5.
be a detective
hopefully by this stage, ur gf will have begun offering directions such as faster, slower, or "down & a little to the left". if not, ur going to have to keep an eye & an ear out for clues...
- moaning, quivering, pelvic gyrating & shouts of "oh god i'm coming" are good signs. no change in her breathing and a corpse-like stiffness are not.
- some women express pleasure in subtle ways, a slight movement or a catch of breath reveals ur on the right track,
- some physical responses are deceptive. a sudden twitch mihght be an ecstatic convulsion, but could also mean whatever ur doing has becom eunpleasantly intense.
- remember the clit is more sensitive than the penis, and while some women enjoy hard & fast stimulation, others hate it.
CRITICAL TIP: u probably already know the clit is nerve ending central. but did u know the surrounding areas are also very sensitive? if u and ur partner are feeling adventurous, combine oral sex with a gentle stimulation of the outer & inner vaginal lips, the vaginal opening,t he stretch of skin between the vagina & the anus.... check out the diagrams at the-clitoris.com/f_html/anatomy.htm for maps.
6.
advanced techniques:
despite the rumours, giving women good oral sex is easy., it's just like pashing. simply let ur tongue take over til you find a movement that drives her wild, then stick with it. but there are a few advanced techniques that'll make u look like a pro.
- the figure eight: run your tongue in a figure-8 pattern over the clitoral area.
- the chuppa chups: suck gently on her clit or take in as much of her genitals as u can. greed can be good!
- tonguing: tenderely insert ur tongue into the vagina to give her a spine-tingling thrill & u get a great new taste sensation. experiment with angles so u don't cause urself an injury, and never ever jab.
- fingering: lots of women get off on having a finger or fingers inserted into their vagina or rectum while they're being licked. check out the vibe first as these techniques can feel intrusive if they're not wanted.
- doggy style: get ur gf to position herself on her hands & knees so u can lick her from behind. very very sexy! and just one of many positions in the kamasutra ripe for an oral reinvention.
CRITICAL TIP: never stop exploring. just coz u've found one oral-sex technique that leaves her weak at the knees doesn't mean there won't be others.
7.
going for gold:
signs ur gf is close to coming: rapid breathing, lots of wetness & engorged genitals (our bits fill with blood, too). here's how to bring her over the edge.
- first, don't worry if youc ant. things may not always go according to plan, but that doesn't mean u haven't given her incredible pleasure. damn right
- if she doesn't seem close to coming or u need a rest, offer to continue using ur hands, or encourage her to bring herself to orgasm by masturbating or using a vibrator.
- if things are looking good, don't speed up automatically. tantalisingly slow movements can also produce earth-shattering results.
- a woman on teh verge of an orgasm may seem to freeze., she might evenq uit breathing and moving altoghether. whatever u do, don't stop. continue doing exactlyw hat ur doing. this is the big moment....
CRITICAL TIP: if ur partner does come, find out exactly whe she wants u to stop licking. continuing for too long can be as bad as stopping too early. steady, direct pressure after orgasm is often a winner, as is starting all over again.
@______________________@ MY FINGERS ARE SO SORE NOW.... (from typing)
hope it helps, guys.
