school problem (1 Viewer)

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hey i have a problem and stumbled across this site, so yeah anyway any help would be appreciated!

i am currently in year 11 at my local public high school. anyway this year my mum has got depression.. i am getting really upset about it ( i never cry at school and i cried and cried during maths the other day and had to go out of class to calm down) i am not allowed to talk to her about stuff ( dad said it would make her even sicker)
i was heaps close to my mum but now i feel like i have no one to talk too ( i havent filled my friends in with it, i dont feel like i can tell them - they just think i am upset because we have heaps of school work.) i am going fairly bad at school ( worse than normal - but maybe it is because of the year 10/11 transition that people talk about)

anyway i was just wondering does this count as a family problem? because i dont know whether to tell a teacher or something. sometimes i get really upset and think i have to tell someone or i will explode, but then my mum clasm down ( coz depression comes and goes) and i think that it isnt really a big problem.

i have one teacher at school i would be comfortable talking too, but i wouldnt just be able to go up to her and start talking. i natural cry all the time, so i am like maybe if i cry in her class she will ask me whats wrong and i can spill???? i dont know what i should do. at the moment i am fairly calm, so i am thinking maybe i am making a big deal about nothing, and that its just me tahts worrying.
thanks for any replies
 

Craig

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Firstly, Im sorry to hear about your mother. I wasn't going to make this news on BOS but what the hell. My mother was recently diagnosed with a form of Leukaemia and my dad lives in Perth, so the care of my mother becomes my obligation, so perhaps i might be able to help you using my own experiences.
In your case, it does count as a family problem. The best thing to do in this type of situation is to ask for help. It always helps to be able to talk to someone. In my view, theres no way your making a big deal about nothing, as the health of our parents is always an important thing. Im sure no one would believe that youre overreacting over nothing.
I was reluctant to tell my friends, however it really does help if you tell them. You tend to feel isolated in situations like this, however if you tell your friends they tend to understand and that feeling of isolation doesn't really exist.
It's a tough situation to be in. Luckily youre in year 11 and none of your marks count towards year 12.
Good luck with it all. If you ever want to stress your frustrations or concerns to anyone, feel free to personal message me. Talking to an absolute stranger does have its advantages.
 

steph@nie

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I'm sorry to hear about your mother, and like Craig, I know what you're talking about. My mum had cancer last year when I was in year 11 and it really does suck. It counts as a family problem, but like Craig said, year 11 doesnt count. I know it doesn't sound like the best advice ever, but trust me it is.
I know all about the crying thing, I think because your mum has depression, a lot of you gets depressed as well out of concern for her. I would burst out into to tears for no reason, and spend many lunch times in the toilets crying and I couldn't, or should I say wouldn't, go outside because I knew why I was crying, but there wasn't a trigger or reason for me to start crying.
If you want to tell a teacher, one that you're comfortable with, then I say do it. It can make your life easier because they understand the reason for when you do get upset. I started crying one day in English and spilt my guts and it helped because I knew that I could always talk to my english teacher if need be.
If you've got good friends, talk to them. You'll need friends that won't pressure you to talk, but are willing to listen. You're always going to need friends and bottling it up and not talking to anyone, is really hard.
If not, like Craig said, talking to a stranger who is going through or gone through the same thing can help. So feel free :) It's a crap deal, but stay positive and good luck.
 

kow_dude

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Hello... and i'm in yr 12 now.
I used to see things pessimistically and suffered depression. Things started to change when i met this guy from school, and taught me how to see things more positively.
I think it's important to see things from a different perspective and enjoy life more positively. Deciding who to talk problems with is really up to you. I found myself comfortable talking to this friend of mine who have similar problems as me.
One quote that inspires me to enjoy life positively is "Live everyday as if it were your last... because one day it will be."
 

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