Script concept too personal and too broad (1 Viewer)

[harpoedits]

Hi,

I was just wondering if anyone else has recieved feedback from their mentor saying that their concept is too personal? My concept is based on family and women in my family, but I have tried to make it clear that I am merely using my family stories as representations of normal working class (and middle class) women throughout various decades in the 20th century.

The second lot of feedback I have recieved is that the concept is too broad. Can anyone help me by telling me what this means? Because I have got the storyline and history worked out, but my mentor is telling me that it is still to broad.

 

[Hombad]

My concept is based on family and women in my family, but I have tried to make it clear that I am merely using my family stories as representations of normal working class (and middle class) women throughout various decades in the 20th century.

Hello harpoedits.

From my experience, I haven't seen/heard of a CREATIVE script for EE2 become successful on a personal angle - I have seen some essays like 'Tapestry' do well in the past using family history but I can't see a creative one doing that well.

Even if you were to use your own family as representations, I still don't think the script would fly. Your content/subject matter/scope of 'analysis'/creativity is necessarily limited by your (un)conscious consideration of your own family, and that is just in the first instance.

I also think that you MUST narrow your script's focus. It is just way too broad to deal with in a way that would net you a great mark consistently.

2 main problems.

1 - you risk generalising/white-washing the diverse and multifarious experiences of many different generations/cultures within a century (think of the differences between the 40s, 50s, 60s, 70s, 80s). Given the standard EE2 marker would be a middle aged, left-leaning woman who probs lived through this time and thus was acutely aware of these differences, I think this would be a bad move to make.

2 - if you do manage to address the many varying experiences of women from this expansive time frame (just one decade/time period would do, e.g. 50s [but that would be super standard though, i.e. classic Atwood/feminist response]), you risk giving a shallow and one-dimensional representation of these given periods. The script would feel insincere and unresearched, and there is no easier way to get 20/40 in the marking centre than by doing this in your major work.

Take my advice with a grain of salt (after all, I did an essay for my major work). But I had 2 mentors for the period, and 2 senior markers giving me advice as well, and having come through the course with some success, I'd think that others would listen to what I have to say. Try to make it less personal (simply to allow you to think more, engage your CREATIVITY a bit), and try to narrow your scope to the most interesting part of the 20th century.

 

[harpoedits]

Hi, thanks for your response!!! But I am still unsure of what you mean by 'narrowing it down'. What do you mean?

 

[Hombad]

Hi, thanks for your response!!! But I am still unsure of what you mean by 'narrowing it down'. What do you mean?

Stick to one aspect of the 20th century for women/middle OR working class, not both as they had different issues (I would recommend middle class, it is more standard but has more to offer). Would you focus on employment, marriage, objectification, bodily harm, child rearing, education, suffrage, equality etc. Maybe pick a few or something, can't do them all to a good depth I don't think.

 

[tigerian]

Did you get your message re above in your private message that I sent you

 

[harpoedits]

Yes I did.

 

[harpoedits]

Hi, I have begun refining my idea and have broken it down to this:

Four teenage girls in the 2000s, the script would be exploring identity and sexuality.

Is this still too broad?

 

[Hombad]

Hi, I have begun refining my idea and have broken it down to this:

Four teenage girls in the 2000s, the script would be exploring identity and sexuality.

Is this still too broad?

No scope is fine (as long as you keep the right plot). BUT. Be very, very, very careful of what you will do with 'teenage girls.' There is a lot of risk in writing a story which may branch into teen angst stuff (as some markers hate it, and often it is done very poorly). It has been done before well, but there are a lot of bad scripts out there. PM me your idea exactly.

I'm posting this stuff in the thread in case any lurkers have similar concerns/circumstances to the OP.