What To Doo?!?! (1 Viewer)

[Shell]

well, this isnt about love, or any relationship with a guy... its my friend, shes one of my closet friends her names alycia. But we aren't speaking at the moment. its a long story but here goes :

she always comments on how people look, not just make up, clothes whatever, she points out really really small things that no one gives a damn about. eg "you have a red spot on your cheek", "my god your wearing ppink eyeshadow!!!" "you eyebrows go up when you look at the page" (serious,y this is the stuff she considers imortant). so this goes on and on, and i just got fed up, i exploded, blew up at her. i'd had enough, and when she commented about he eyebrow thing, i just calmly said "i never realised how much of a shallow person you are. you are really shallow! you only ever look at people's appearance"
she was like "dont say that about me! im not!"
"you are! every morning without fail you will look people up and down then say something about he way they look. all you see is a persons looks"
"shut up! im not shallow!"
"whatever"
i was careful not to swear at her or anything, i just wanted to say how it is, the very truth.

so that was yesterday morning, and we havent spoken since. ive talked to a mutual friend and she said that lysh will not talk to me if i dont apologise.

im a really really stubborn, proud person, i cant apologise. i know im right, everything i said was the absolute truth, yet it is killing me not talking to her. At school today i tried talking to her, she just turned her nose up and ignored me.


omg what do i do!? should i just swallow my pride and apologise?! shes being so immature!!!

 

[blackbunny]

the thing here is. u want to make her talking to u. let her cool down for a week but dont talk to her, dont even look at her. just ignore her. i bet u she will crack up first ^_^

 

[Dreamerish*~]

is that all she cares about?
by that i mean does she generally talk a lot about everything or does she only talk about people's appearances?
i know how you'd feel. if i was you i wouldn't apologise either, especially if you didn't blow up and shout at her. she should think about what image she's making of herself, and that other people might not like her rambling on about looks.
you should just wait awhile, if she still doesn't talk to you then i guess it's up to you to try half-apologise to her
or maybe you should tell her that you don't mean to offend her by what you said, but it's the truth and that side of her doesn't make you think much of her. say that you're only suggesting she take less notice of people's appearance, if not that, then don't point it out to others as much.

hope everything works out

 

[Shell]

wow im feeling a lot better by what you guys have said, coz you are of the opinion i am. but i miss her so terribly, even after one day!! i cant just apologise. i still stand by what i said. i dunno how i can last a week not talking to her. shes on msn now.... am i supposed to talk to her? her msn name is clearly aimed at me: "tempd, mad , lost, lonli... your blind to the movements behind my eyes, you used to see so well"

 

[Shell]

oh, and she DOES talk abotu other things... but when she first sees someone, she only ever comments on little things on them. like every morning when we meet at school, she'll pick something out about what your wearing, make up, or hair, or anything! this isnt just me, i notice how she picks on other people as well

 

[braad]

dont give into her if she's so damned shallow, she sounded it

make her learn to respect your decision in thinking she's shallow from her actions, which if happen each morning, show she is exactly what you said...err....shallow.

blackbunny was right, let her come to you, she has the problem, not you, even though you care about her and miss her, she's gonna have to elarn some day to stop making unnecassary comments such as the examples you gave.

dont be rude, but dont be nice or give in

 

[Dreamerish*~]

oh, and she DOES talk abotu other things... but when she first sees someone, she only ever comments on little things on them. like every morning when we meet at school, she'll pick something out about what your wearing, make up, or hair, or anything! this isnt just me, i notice how she picks on other people as well

goodness, that must be annoying.
but i can tell she's a close friend, and i know what it's like to have fights with close friends, the awkwardness of not talking to each other
maybe you should try talk to her, it probably won't be good to keep ignoring each other.
keep trying until she stops ignoring you, by then she'll probably be calm enough to think about what you're saying.

 

[funky_a]

She's an incredibly insecure person and you should make yourself insanely hot just to spite her

 

[Shell]

lol i wanted to cover myself with tiny spots or something! wear my clothes inside out so she'd go insane and start pointing it out! "OMG YOU HAVE SPOTS ALL OVER YOU!!!!!!!!!"
arrrugghh!!!what the hell am i meant to do here? i want to email her, but what do i say?! im actually at the stage now where i will apologies but its really really hard when i dont know exactly what im apologising for!!!

 

[funky_a]

So don't apologise! You did nothing wrong. Friends need to be honest with each other and she's only pissy because you told the truth about her.

 

[Tuggi3]

you don't have to apologise.
You can just calmly email her and tell her what you've told us. That you value her friendship and think of her as a really close friend, but it just frustrates you that sometimes she focuses alot on the physical.
You don't have to apologise for what you said, but you can apologise for hurting her feelings i guess, if what she wants to hear is an apology.

 

[Shell]

well, i emailed her, but shes still not talking to me on msn, and no email is sent back.. i assume shes read it, it was sent a while ago... i just basically said what you guys have told me to say, i didnt apologise, and i explained to her that i wont belcause i didnt do anything. thanks guys! you helped heaps

 

[Alimoe_KG]

goodness, that must be annoying.
but i can tell she's a close friend, and i know what it's like to have fights with close friends, the awkwardness of not talking to each other
maybe you should try talk to her, it probably won't be good to keep ignoring each other.
keep trying until she stops ignoring you, by then she'll probably be calm enough to think about what you're saying.

You ignored me for a while

 

[shortie_689]

Do NOT apologise you are not in the wrong at all... I have several friends like this my best friend is like that she is the kind of person who gives u shit in a joke an expects u to just take it... I always tell her I don't like it or wat she is doing she doesnt talk to me for a while but within a week she is back doing it again

 

[iambored]

Apologise that you made her feel bad but not for what you said because you believe it is true

 

[HellVeN]

I rekon you should post a message on an internet message board asking for help.

 

[shortie_689]

Apologise that you made her feel bad but not for what you said because you believe it is true

thats clever
neat little tactic

 

[Shell]

well, i did that! hahaha and it helped! i caved. i missed her too much. i ended up messaging her telling her i love her and miss her, then she rang me and i was so glad to hear her talking to me i said sorry.

 

[Dreamerish*~]

You ignored me for a while

ROFL i wasn't talking about you sheesh.
not EVERYTHING revolves around you.