Will you ever break up because parents told you to? (3 Viewers)

[evil_kitten]

I've been in this situation before and yes, I did break up with him. The relationship had lasted a year and we had been close friends previously. My parents never liked his 'arty' and 'laid back' personality. The situation came to a head when he defended me to my parents and they believed he had stepped out of line. They gave me the ultimatum of stay with him and the entire family will disown you. So I made my choice...

Until I am married and settled I will always take my mothers opinions of my partners into consideration. I know she will only have my best interests in mind and has a fresh outside perspective.

no offence, i have nothing against you personally
but WTF? what the hell will you do when your some middle age spinster, with no mum around to tell you who to marry?
its the basic fundamentals of parents - unless he's a good little christian (or whatever your faith is) boy with tonnes of money and a law degree, theyre not gonna like him.

 

[tommykins]

no offence, i have nothing against you personally
but WTF? what the hell will you do when your some middle age spinster, with no mum around to tell you who to marry?
its the basic fundamentals of parents - unless he's a good little christian (or whatever your faith is) boy with tonnes of money and a law degree, theyre not gonna like him.

oh stfu please you have no idea.

i'm currently in a pretty fucked up relationship - and for some reason my parents were right from the beginning.

i will definitely take their viewpoints into consideration, as aza said - they're really looking out for you.

but that's to say you will definitely listen to them, infatuation makes you do stupi dthings.

 

[withoutaface]

My parents have usually been pretty perceptive insofar as the girls they've loved have been the ones which I've liked a whole lot more, and the ones they disliked were ones from really fucked up relationships that in retrospect I should have gotten out of sooner.

 

[evil_kitten]

oh stfu please you have no idea.

i'm currently in a pretty fucked up relationship - and for some reason my parents were right from the beginning.

i will definitely take their viewpoints into consideration, as aza said - they're really looking out for you.

but that's to say you will definitely listen to them, infatuation makes you do stupi dthings.

well i guess it depends on your parents then
but in the end isnt it really your choice? its your life.

 

[chamelia]

no offence, i have nothing against you personally
but WTF? what the hell will you do when your some middle age spinster, with no mum around to tell you who to marry?
its the basic fundamentals of parents - unless he's a good little christian (or whatever your faith is) boy with tonnes of money and a law degree, theyre not gonna like him.

You bleed naivety.

 

[^CoSMic DoRiS^^]

No, because my parents wouldn't tell me to break up with someone in the ''you must not date this person'' kind of way. They'd make it pretty clear if they didn't like the guy, though, which would affect the relationship because

1. I respect my parents and generally value their opinion on stuff
2. They would make their dislike clearly known to him as well as to me, which would be awkward...we'd pretty much never be able to hang at my house ever again

 

[tommykins]

well i guess it depends on your parents then
but in the end isnt it really your choice? its your life.

lol. such a young and naive mind.

 

[evil_kitten]

You bleed naivety.

why thank you very much.

 

[tommykins]

No, because my parents wouldn't tell me to break up with someone in the ''you must not date this person'' kind of way. They'd make it pretty clear if they didn't like the guy, though, which would affect the relationship because

1. I respect my parents and generally value their opinion on stuff
2. They would make their dislike clearly known to him as well as to me, which would be awkward...we'd pretty much never be able to hang at my house ever again

haha more or less gets the job done doesn't it?

 

[tommykins]

ohhh tommykins, [I'm curious... tell me your girlfriend problems here, why do your parents hate your hot slut?]

hahaha quite frankly because she's really rude.

she never greets my parents when she comes over, and when i remind her to she goes ape shit at me for forcing her to show some goddamn common courtesy. complete and utter rudeness. i shouldn't expect less though, she doesn't respect her own parents.

she also never cleans up after herself when she gets food.

as well as that, my parents dislike her for the fact a while ago she read my chatlogs with my mates whilst i was asleep and letting her use my laptop (which i thought she was watching simpsons on?)

long story eb.

 

[^CoSMic DoRiS^^]

haha more or less gets the job done doesn't it?

Yeah pretty much hey

They don't get that whole ''this person is a guest in my home so I will hold my tongue and be nice'' idea. If they don't like you or something you do, you will know about it. No problems if they do like you though.

 

[tommykins]

Yeah pretty much hey

They don't get that whole ''this person is a guest in my home so I will hold my tongue and be nice'' idea. If they don't like you or something you do, you will know about it. No problems if they do like you though.

how bad is it though?

if they don't like it because your partner does something direct to them (ie. being rude/disrespectful) then that's fair enough, otherwise if they don't like something like the way he dresses then it's pretty stupid.

 

[Rafy]

Heavens no, I'd kindly tell them to fuck off. It really is none of their business. Thankfully though they would never ask that.

 

[^CoSMic DoRiS^^]

how bad is it though?

if they don't like it because your partner does something direct to them (ie. being rude/disrespectful) then that's fair enough, otherwise if they don't like something like the way he dresses then it's pretty stupid.

Oh they're nice people and everything, they aren't unreasonable by any means. They just treat their children's guests the same as they'd treat their children (me/sis) if that makes sense. So where I would probably say to a guest, would you mind turning that music down dear? (lol), my mum has no problem being like OI WTF ARE YOU DOING TURN THAT MUSIC DOWN YOU DELINQUENT LOL like she would say to me.

But on the whole liking/disliking people thing...they will kind of just show it in their attitude, like they aren't as friendly, don't talk to them much or ask interrogating questions, etc.

It takes a lot for them to not like somebody though so it hasn't ever really come up except with one friend I had years ago who probably deserved it

They speak their minds is all

 

[tommykins]

Oh they're nice people and everything, they aren't unreasonable by any means, they just treat their children's guests the same as they'd treat their children (me/sis) if that makes sense. So where I would probably say to a guest, would you mind turning that music down dear? (lol), my mum has no problem being like OI WTF ARE YOU DOING TURN THAT MUSIC DOWN YOU DELINQUENT LOL like she would say to me.

But on the whole liking/disliking people thing...they will kind of just show it in their attitude, like they aren't as friendly, don't talk to them much or ask interrogating questions, etc.

It takes a lot for them to not like somebody though so it hasn't ever really come up except with one friend I had years ago who probably deserved it

They speak their minds is all

ah i see.

that's quite interesting, intimidating at the same time i guess.

my parents are still nice about it all but they often make it known to me if they dislike a trait of someone.

just had a talk with parents about breakup, it's pretty comforting.

 

[evil_kitten]

my step dad is just rude to everyone
and my mum is overly nice to everyone

it tends to freak people out
but i'm moving out next year, so its all good =)

 

[hermand]

i'm not sure. i guess it would depend on the person and the reason.

my mum's fairly intuitive about people's personalities and anything they're hiding, so i'd trust her judgement. i don't think it would ever get to the point where my parents would ask me to break up with someone, if they were rude to my parents or were treating me like crap or something, i'd break up with them before my parents got involved.

 

[tommykins]

yeah i think a more appropriate title would be
'would you take your parents opinion into consideraton about a partner'

 

[evil_kitten]

i'm not sure. i guess it would depend on the person and the reason.

my mum's fairly intuitive about people's personalities and anything they're hiding, so i'd trust her judgement. i don't think it would ever get to the point where my parents would ask me to break up with someone, if they were rude to my parents or were treating me like crap or something, i'd break up with them before my parents got involved.

lol i wish my mum was good at picking up on stuff.
but no, shes spectacularly unobservant.
my friend once stood next to her and did the chicken dance, humming and all, for about 20 mins then gave up cuz she didnt notice..

 

[sladehk]

lol @ ninja