Chinese parenting compared to Western (3 Viewers)

[Arceupins]

lolyes

lolno

 

[Drongoski]

Off the tangent again, and for those of you who are Chinese and may be curious: the surname Chua is the Hokkien and Teochew [i.e. Fujian & Chaozhou in Mandarin] version of the surname Cai (Mandarin, in pinyin), Tsai (Taiwanese Wade-Giles spelling - in Mandarin). In Hokkien/Teochew it is sometimes spelt Chuah (In Penang & Northern Peninsula Malaysia), Tjoa (in Indonesia; new spelling Coa). In Cantonese/Hakka: Chai, Chye, Choy, Choi etc. In Hainanese sometimes (quite correctly transliterated) Sua. In Vietnamese it is Thai. In Korean, usually Chae, Chai etc

 

[Drongoski]

No. Chinese parenting not superior.

 

[Shadowdude]

Because?

 

[Drongoski]

Because?

Haha I just wanted to keep this thread alive. I should have just typed 'Bump' but was too embarassed to do it. But more seriously, I think a judicious combination of both East & West is a better approach. Western too lax, Chinese too strict and inflexible. But then again there is no such thing as one uniform Chinese parenting method.

In fact from what I've recently read, many Chinese have rejected the so-called Chinese parenting method and are leaning increasingly towards the Western approach ("with Chinese characteristics" I suppose) in the hope of producing more creative and original thinkers and entrepreneurs like Steve Jobs, Bill Gates and Zuckerberg.

 

[ruchira2122]

There's only so much a person can achieve with hard work - the article implies any kid can become what he wants if his parents push him hard. It's untrue. To become a mathematician or an astrophysicist hard work isn't enough. The article doesn't bring up intelligence at all. East Asians do well partly because of a hard working culture but it's mainly because East Asian groups have higher average IQs than whites.

If there are any Chinese in this thread, don't give the Anglos the satisfaction by agreeing with the article. Be proud of your genes and natural abilities.

that is the most outrageously idiotic comment i've read on BoS. well done, you passed the dickhead test.

 

[Shadowdude]

ruchira, to contend: there is a hard working culture in Asia in general - and on average, East Asians have a higher average IQ than Caucasians.

So maybe you're saying that, 'mainly because of the IQ' is the point of contention?

 

[Drongoski]

that is the most outrageously idiotic comment i've read on BoS. well done, you passed the dickhead test.

You don't hang out @ Epping Library, do you?

 

[ruchira2122]

ruchira, to contend: there is a hard working culture in Asia in general - and on average, East Asians have a higher average IQ than Caucasians.

So maybe you're saying that, 'mainly because of the IQ' is the point of contention?

im disagreeing with the "East Asians have a higher average IQ than Caucasians" comment. it's much more likely to do with East Asians (in general) placing a higher value on the academic side of things than Caucasians. that has nothing to do with a higher average IQ...

You don't hang out @ Epping Library, do you?

lol not so much this year, but it was my 2nd home last year during hsc

 

[ribosome911]

That article sounds way too extreme. But well I have always thought such extremity only happens in rare cases even for an Asian/Chinese family.
I'm Asian and my mother never pushes me into studying full hard or academic success or that sort of thing. It's me who pushes myself, and when I start to get stressed because of year 12 and everything she even tells me not to worry too much, even if I fail there'll always be a second chance, and the important thing is that I stay healthy and feel good about myself, that sort of thing. For my brother who is lazier/less interested in study, she actually tells him off once in a while, but that is far from pushing, she does get annoyed, but doesn't force him or anything, and still believes that he can be academically successful if he tries and knows he'll be alright in the future.
I think that strict parenting as well known in Asian families (but of course that does not apply to Asian family) is due to past experiences of the parents themselves. I know a lot of Asian parents who as kids were poor and couldn't afford for an education beyond primary and such, so when they have children they do expect them to have a higher life standard than that of their own, and since academic success usually is the gateway to a quantum leap in life standards and everything, they want their children to be academically successful in order to have a life the parents themselves had hoped for but couldn't have the opportunity to achieve.
Well I'm not defending anyone but I think we've gotta consider other things as well, I agree that Asian parenting in one way or another is stricter than Western parenting, but there are pros and cons to both of them. It's just that you have to learn to live with your parents and accept that they sometimes have their own unreasonable and unbearable actions, and learn to forge self-confidence and sense of freedom into yourself (if your parents' actions only bring negative effect upon you). After all it's you who control your life!

 

[ribosome911]

That article sounds way too extreme# But well I have always thought such extremity only happens in rare cases even for an Asian/Chinese family#
I'm Asian and my mother never pushes me into studying full hard or academic success or that sort of thing# It's me who pushes myself, and when I start to get stressed because of year 12 and everything she even tells me not to worry too much, even if I fail there'll always be a second chance, and the important thing is that I stay healthy and feel good about myself, that sort of thing# For my brother who is lazier/less interested in study, she actually tells him off once in a while, but that is far from pushing, she does get annoyed, but doesn't force him or anything, and still believes that he can be academically successful if he tries and knows he'll be alright in the future#
I think that strict parenting as well known in Asian families #but of course that does not apply to Asian family# is due to past experiences of the parents themselves# I know a lot of Asian parents who as kids were poor and couldn't afford for an education beyond primary and such, so when they have children they do expect them to have a higher life standard than that of their own, and since academic success usually is the gateway to a quantum leap in life standards and everything, they want their children to be academically successful in order to have a life the parents themselves had hoped for but couldn't have the opportunity to achieve#
Well I'm not defending anyone but I think we've gotta consider other things as well, I agree that Asian parenting in one way or another is stricter than Western parenting, but there are pros and cons to both of them# It's just that you have to learn to live with your parents and accept that they sometimes have their own unreasonable and unbearable actions, and learn to forge self-confidence and sense of freedom into yourself #if your parents' actions only bring negative effect upon you## After all it's you who control your life!

 

[ribosome911]

well, sorry for the double post, dont noe why it happens!

 

[Drongoski]

well, sorry for the double post, dont noe why it happens!

You can delete 1.

Most parents (Asian or not) love their children and want them to have a better future. If sometimes they have erred, forgive them, for often they don't know any better.

 

[Jaundice]

There's only so much a person can achieve with hard work - the article implies any kid can become what he wants if his parents push him hard. It's untrue. To become a mathematician or an astrophysicist hard work isn't enough. The article doesn't bring up intelligence at all. East Asians do well partly because of a hard working culture but it's mainly because East Asian groups have higher average IQs than whites.

If there are any Chinese in this thread, don't give the Anglos the satisfaction by agreeing with the article. Be proud of your genes and natural abilities.

See this thread here: http://community.boredofstudies.org/showthread.php?t=253681&page=1

i dont think a high mental compacity is confined to any particular race.

People all have natural abilities like some people will never be able to jump 5m in long jump despite training like hell whereas others can do it easily.

Mental compacity and intelligence both heavily rely on memory.

You can study like hell everyday and still be shit at school. Others don't need to study and are ace at school.

Natural abilities. We all are different.

 

[mirakon]

well, sorry for the double post, dont noe why it happens!

you do realise that with this post, you made it a triple post?

 

[cosmo kramer]

i dont think a high mental compacity is confined to any particular race.

He was not saying that it was. He is merely making the argument that a possible reason that Asians achieve academically, on average, better than other groups, is due to the fact that, on average, Asians are more intelligent, and this advatange is partially or entirely a product of differential genotypic frequencies.

 

[cantseecats]

Have there been any studies done on Asians (you're talking specifically about East Asians, Chinese, Koreans, Japanese etc. right?) that actually show the IQ differences? It's entirely believable. Culture can't play that much of a role in IQ, intelligence and academic achievement. I find it hard to believe that some white bogan with an IQ of 100 whose living on the dole could have become a brain surgeon if only he had grown up with Chinese parents..

 

[Jaundice]

He was not saying that it was. He is merely making the argument that a possible reason that Asians achieve academically, on average, better than other groups, is due to the fact that, on average, Asians are more intelligent, and this advatange is partially or entirely a product of differential genotypic frequencies.

Oh lol I miss read his post.

The Asian education system and parents push their kids more in asian countries because there are so many of them they have to fight for everything. I guess the hardworking has been ingrained in them in at least the last 100 years so when parents come over here they do the same to their kids.

 

[Drongoski]

Oh lol I miss read his post.

The Asian education system and parents push their kids more in asian countries because there are so many of them they have to fight for everything. I guess the hardworking has been ingrained in them in at least the last 100 years so when parents come over here they do the same to their kids.

Basically that's correct. Surviving has never been easy - so they develop this culture of frugality, hardwork, great capacity to endure pain and stoicism. As a result they are hardy, resilient and are great survivors.

I personally know of so many "students" who came here from China around 12 to 20 years ago (the 1st batch if you like). They took all sorts of menial jobs (dish washers; assistants at the wholesale fish markets, shop assistants, assistants to tradesmen etc). Many of them were University graduates (very much harder to get into unis there). Today they own a house and some of them have multiple investment properties. Some of their children are probably active on this very BOS right now..

 

[Jaundice]

I envy their work ethic so much.

I am such a lazy "whitey" who will probably never work to my potential or push myself to be better.

I need an AZN mama who will beat me with a rolling pin if i do bad