BOS Showcase: 2009 Major Works (4 Viewers)

[jess39]

accio.brain, I just read yours and loved it. At first I was a bit confused about who all the people were, and I had to go back a few times to remember which name went with each character, but that could just be my bad memory... Also, I didn't realise until I read your RS that the first-person narrator was the art gallery, though, again, that was probably me not being very perceptive.

That said, I love your use of language. I'm not a massive fan of the style of narrative you wrote (I generally prefer more straightforward, linear pieces...) but I read your story straight through. I loved the sunflower motif. The whole thing made me sigh and smile. I feel like going and dancing in a field of sunflowers now. Or something. lol.

I'm sure you'll get a fantastic mark.

I'm in awe of everyone who manages to say so much in their reflection statements, and yet stays firmly within the word count. I feel like I had to cut so much out, and I didn't get to say half of what I should have.

edit: mrs destiny, you should post it! We don't bite.*













*hard

 

[accio.brain]

haha, thank you marquelle

accio.brain, I just read yours and loved it. At first I was a bit confused about who all the people were, and I had to go back a few times to remember which name went with each character, but that could just be my bad memory... Also, I didn't realise until I read your RS that the first-person narrator was the art gallery, though, again, that was probably me not being very perceptive.

That said, I love your use of language. I'm not a massive fan of the style of narrative you wrote (I generally prefer more straightforward, linear pieces...) but I read your story straight through. I loved the sunflower motif. The whole thing made me sigh and smile. I feel like going and dancing in a field of sunflowers now. Or something. lol.

I'm sure you'll get a fantastic mark.

I'm in awe of everyone who manages to say so much in their reflection statements, and yet stays firmly within the word count. I feel like I had to cut so much out, and I didn't get to say half of what I should have.

edit: mrs destiny, you should post it! We don't bite.*













*hard

aw, thanks jess! I know what you mean, I usually like the more linear-style narrative too, not sure how I ended up getting to what I did... I was a bit apprehensive about using 4 main characters, I hoped that they wouldn't get too confusing but I can understand how they would. The other thing was the fact that the art gallery was the narrator - a few people who read mine didn't pick up on it, but then others told me it was obvious so I guess it just depends. That's the good thing about having a RS I guess, to point out all the little details! Thanks again

 

[diametric]

Just read All That Glitters Gold =]

At first, like Jess, I was a bit confused with the characters, and had to go back to keep track, BUT, I really liked it as it developed, and I was like, oh oh! as more of each character was revealed. I'm generally a fan of these jigsaw type stories, where you have to paste things together.

I loved the parts about Vincent Van Gogh. Though, I felt like I would of liked to of seen more of him actually painting (though there was the one scene where he was drawing Sien). The Van Gogh parts as well as some other elements reminded me of Stephen King's Duma Key.

I did NOT get that the art gallery was the narrator, and did wonder a few times, who is the I here? Now that I know, I'm like, oooh! but, I feel like it could of been made more obvious, and then I would of been able to appreciate it as I read.

I also felt like... it lacked plot? But then again, I don't think a plot is necessarily the most important thing. You had strong characters, and I felt like knowing a bit more about each one, and I guess that's part of the limitation of having four main characters, but I also LIKE the fact that I want to know more.

and finally, haha, I thought it was a very aesthetically beautiful piece. I also think it'll do quite well.

 

[accio.brain]

Thanks diametric yeah, there are some things I'd probably alter a bit if I were to do it again, but thanks for the comments

 

[marcquelle]

Thanks diametric yeah, there are some things I'd probably alter a bit if I were to do it again, but thanks for the comments

i think we all have that same thought, i know i do, so much i would touch up if i could

 

[diametric]

yup. like. yknow. start the RS a week before its due =[

 

[diametric]

come on people. post your MWs.
id like to see some different mediums. still no speeches, drama, performance poetry, films.

i hope to see the day when someone makes a feature film for ext 2. its never been done before.

 

[marcquelle]

come on people. post your MWs.
id like to see some different mediums. still no speeches, drama, performance poetry, films.

i hope to see the day when someone makes a feature film for ext 2. its never been done before.

lols yeah some more variety would be interesting, not that every thing else here has been interesting but really wanna see a film or cr. Come on people don't be afraid its not like we can steal your work now and send it in.

 

[diametric]

there has been a cr, one which i enjoyed! most of the CRs in the showcase i dont understand. it was about battlestar galactica and terminator: sarah connor chronicles, so I found that fun to read =]

 

[mackiavell]

Two out of the four people in my Ext2 class did video. When they upload their movies to youtube, and I ask them if I can, I'll post the links here.

In the meantime, any reactions to my major? So far out of the one's I've read alex.leon's poetry has been my favourite. I liked the Vampire Bee one as well.

 

[marcquelle]

thanks for the comment about my drama my teacher doesn't really like it

Diametric where is this cr you speak of i wish to read, but i can't find it in this forum

 

[diametric]

I'll get around to yours in the morning, mackiavell. My brain is numb right now.

 

[alex.leon]

Two out of the four people in my Ext2 class did video. When they upload their movies to youtube, and I ask them if I can, I'll post the links here.

In the meantime, any reactions to my major? So far out of the one's I've read alex.leon's poetry has been my favourite. I liked the Vampire Bee one as well.

Wow, thanks! I'm so happy that everyone's reacting well to my major. I was so worried it would be too cryptic.

PS- i'm with diametric- will read yours tomorrow. i promised asubmarine i'd give them some feedback tonight, and im just re-reading the reflection statement.

 

[alex.leon]

cheers, I look forward to it

So, I promised feedback and here it is (at 2am in the morning, too! feel loved!!)

First of all, I think your word choice/language is phenomenal. There were a few images I read, where I went 'Damn, if only I could've put those words together..!' ('formless smother of midnight' for example...brilliant!).

There was an earnestness and simplicity (in the very best sense of the word) in your poetry that I liked. To be completely honest, I'm not really a fan of 'puzzle poetry' (ie, poetry where you have to make large assumptions to actually 'get' it), and when I skimmed through your work earlier I was worried that it would be too hard to try and deconstruct everything. But after reading the RS, everything fell into place. Your words felt...honest. And I like that- nobody enjoys pretentious poetry.

So overall, after marinading in the work, pondering it, letting it sit in my stomach, I found it to be quite excellent. Kind of trumped all confidence I had in getting a good mark, to be honest. Now I know the incredible standards. Good work, and you deserve the very best of marks

 

[alex.leon]

I did EX2 but I'm a bit hesitant to post mine up. I just know someone will find some horrific spelling mistake. I'm usually just a lurker on here...

BUT, from reading some of the other compositions I reckon there's going to be a few E4s.

I read one of the poetry works; "quick fix, cheap thrill". I was a little indifferent at first but the diction and word choice was pretty wonderful. The author definitely has a very good economy of words.
eg:

"It’s funny when the word ‘buy’ / fits comfortably in your mouth. / Sits just right.

All round good job I think.

I might go and read a few more...

Post it up, man. No-one's going to rip it to shreads (unless its a teen angst number, then there will be some definite rippage)

And thanks for the compliment. Really appreciate it!

 

[alex.leon]

mackiavell: Just decided to screw getting a good nights sleep, and read your MW. I read your RS first and was SO excited to sink my teeth into the story as my poetry was heavily influenced by Brave New World (and 1984 to an extent), and I love dystopian fiction.
First of all, love the dog metaphor in 'I said Hi, I'm John'. That just struck me as really poignant. Also love all the different perspectives giving us clues and slowly showing the 'plot' (not really the right word, hey. Ummm...central idea/Sheperd's psyche?). Great attention to detail, makes each story that little bit more believable, and your style of writing is engaging and sustains interest throughout (oh, and I love how you dig that little bit deeper, less storytelling, more emotional analysis/detail- awesome!). Just great overall. Like I said, I'm a fan of dystopian fiction, and I was definitely a fan of this. Congrats!

PS- your RS seemed rather short though!

 

[Scinery]

omg you people are insane writers o_o

haha i tried to get rid of it..the comments on my script were by a friend.

EDIT: uploaded again without the random comments! XD

 

[alex.leon]

omg you people are insane writers o_o

haha i tried to get rid of it..the comments on my script were by a friend.

Noooooo I'm looking forward to reading yours!

 

[ekoolish]

Here's mine, enjoy. MW and RS
Couldn't upload the final copy because BOS doesn't allow wps files, but this has practically the same content, bar some aesthetics and grammar/spelling edits.

 

[Clifford]

This is brilliant. I was going to use today to get into post-trial study, but instead I'll post my major work up and spend all day here reading them. Brillig and the perfect way to spend my sunday.

Here it goes, I've only read Jess' so far, but mine's a bit... irreverent for extension 2.

Just realised we're meant to be saying medium and title so...

Short Story: ALPHABETANIA: A FRABJOUS GUIDE