Fav. Teacher sayings? (1 Viewer)

[fashionista]

my maths teacher...she is the bestest ever...she hates coke and my friend was drinking it one day and she goes
"Spit that rubbish out of your mouth and throw it in the toilet and flush the toilet and then apologise to the toilet!"

im gonna miss her

 

[mattsta]

English teacher:

Im really PISSED OFF.

 

[welshi]

my maths teacher from term 1 last year... so many classics.

-hey guys, what's the G-O?

-what is this, bush week?

-oh gareth, you're a sausage.

-you're a fair dinkum galah, son - with black curly hair!

and my modern teacher. thinks he's funnier than he is but don't they all.

-james, you are a dick.

-it's not a duma. (only russian history students who have seen terminator will understand.)

-i came to this school and i see that you're not allowed to bring whiteout to school. ok, i think, these kids don't make mistakes. then i hear comments like THAT and i realise it's because people are drinking the stuff.

 

[Kimmie_D]

Well i love my maths teacher (And stop if ur startingt o think affair) he is English as in he comes from england. Well the other day he said that he was going to teach us to say something in English and it goes kinda like this.

Two pints of largaur and a packet of crisps, please?

 

[mervvyn]

-i came to this school and i see that you're not allowed to bring whiteout to school. ok, i think, these kids don't make mistakes. then i hear comments like THAT and i realise it's because people are drinking the stuff.

that's gold

 

[taxman]

Just trying to remember some of my teacher's best sayings this year...I only got a few, and some of these are from last year or the year before, but here goes.

My english teacher and the chummy english teacher from next door were chatting away, and one of the history teachers walks in and goes "Jesus christ, does anybody know how to turn this woman off!?" Then she goes, "Well, you've got it figured...you turned me off as soon as you entered the room." It was hilarious!

My maths teacher from last year, Mr. Black, some of the best statements. He's in his late 60's I'm guessing...so make sure you picture an older guy, he's like my grand-dad.

- Me: "Sir, I can't figure out this question."
Mr. Black: "That's because you're not a cricketer son, give up the swimming and start playing cricket."

- Mr. Black: "Build a bridge...*turns away to face chalkboard*...and get over it." *starts to laugh to himself*

- Mr. Black: (Talking about kids on holidays) "Kids these days, they leave school grounds and they walk around *starts shaking* 'gotta have fun!' 'gotta have fun!' let's go kick some guys head in who's carrying a baby."

And then my Chemistry teacher's favourite saying, "Have a good weekend" as we leave the class on a Wednesday.

My Year 8 Maths teacher (Of arab descent).

Me: "Sir, I've got the answer to number 4...but there's no answers to check...have I done it right"
Him: *standing up the front* "You must work it."
Me: I have, I just need to be told that I'm doing good so I feel better about myself.
Him: *Pauses and waits* "You must work it."

 

[Iron]

Maths teacher:
"Ok, alright, ok STOP TALK"
"Look as if you're working"
"'Yes Mr Green.'"

Biz:
"In terms of"

Eng:
"If-you-weren't-so-inebriated-by-the-exhuberance-of-your-own-verbosity, you'd see that..."

 

[x-y-z]

My English teacher was the most insane person I’ve ever met. She said that EVERYTHING could be related to Oedipus complex. And she would prove it regularly. She would say goody goody gumdrops (in a patronizing way) and tough cookies (in a patronizing way), and she would call everyone dumbasses, and say that she was there to enlighten us. She gave out a lot of handouts, and everyday at the start of the lesson she would come around and check if they were glued in our books (we were in year 12), and if not, she would give us detentions. Once when she came around checking to see if we’d done our homework, and around ¾ of the class hadn’t, she started crying! And regardless how this may seem we were NOT a bad class.

My economics teacher would often label the points on supply/demands curves as F C U K

My HSC prep teacher remind us every lesson that she’s not an evangelist- WTF?!

Oh and totally unrelated, but my school would play 10 seconds of music instead of a bell, and on the last day before the holidays, the final song as we were leaving was “who let the dogs out” (it was a girls’ school). Hmmm…

 

[jabba_wocky]

my geog teacher would always use "ok, jot this down"

my yr 7 science teacher would get really pissed, go to the blackboard. and say
"WHY WONT YOU LISTEN!!!" while banging his head against the board. no shit, he really did! we also pushed him to the stage where he walked outside of the classroom and say "fu*k" stamping his feet and kicking the wall.

you wouldn't believe the amount of teacher changes here. I have had three different english teachers other the last two and half years!

my favorite memory of my yr 9 maths teacher was when he wanted to know how a computer program is uninstalled and used. So there i was explaining this baby how microsoft word works. He then proceeding to prove that by deleting the office folder, the program wouldn't work. he then tried opening a word document, obvisously it didn't work. errors poped here, illegal operation that. and he asked me "why isn't it working?"

another time he wanted to use the schools external burner for some backups or something, anyway the burner was being used in the compo lab. he look at the monitor blankly noticing that it was burning something, he then looked at the burner, lights flahsing "burn in progress". any normal person would notice this. my yr 9 maths teacher wasn't normal, "pop", the burner was disconnected.

just the other day, i was playing a double match of tennis, i had aced the opposition three times. my maths teacher was pointing and laughing. while doing this i proceeded to ace them yet again. i served the ball with full power, infortunately it veered to the left and struck my maths teacher right elbom. geez, you should've seen the bruise. of course i was trying to stop my guts from exploding with laughter.

 

[zhongie]

I remember in Year 10 Science, when we were a smart but lazy class, our teacher (who was REALLY notoriously tough) and would give detentions if we were a minute late...broke down and cried.
She called us the worst class ever, and that we were like pigs...! She said we took her pearls of wisdom and stomped on them...

At this point, we got very confused, but we bought her flowers to make up for it. She still hated us.

 

[d__o__a]

my music teacher has had a lot of funny sayings, e.g.
"pair off into groups of three"
"can't you count, C-U-N-T"
"split up and form one big group"

 

[malkin86]

(male) Student: What's a coxcomb? It's not in the dictionary...

(Female) English Teacher: It's a hat but there's a double meaning. Colloquial term for penis, give me one.

Promptly shortened to "Penis, give me one" in the quotebook by the rest of the boys...

"I can't hear you, I've got my reading glasses on." - same teacher.

Our principal, in full lecture-mode: The year 7s and 8s are not there for your pleasure!

 

[twisted_sista00]

an tell more about a person by what they say about others than what they say about themselves"
-my music teacher, said to us many a lesson when we were bitching about someone or other

 

[randhi]

My maths teacher told me this:
"I seldom say i'm right, i've been proved wrong too many times"

 

[sukiyaki]

my maths teacher
"am i talking to the wall"
no answer
"i am arent I"

 

[Silverstone]

"Gentlemen...and I use that term loosely!"

 

[A_J_Gray]

ive got a bloke at my school called mr haran
he doesnt say anything funny just random. youll be sitting in the middle of class and itll be quiet and he'll say

"its not a haircut its a faircut"

weirdo

 

[dezzy]

My yr 9/10 Science teacher allllllways used to say:
"Ok now ladies and gentleman- and i use that term VERY lightly!"

My yr11/12 Maths teacher, when having an arugment with someone alllllways used to say:
"keep going!"
So funny! E.G. Me n My friend got kicked out of the room for talking about Brazilian Waxes, and when she came outside to give us this big lecture we were arguing with her and when she didnt have a come-bak she just used to say "Keep Going!"....so we did.....and got a weeks worth of detentions...lol...ah, it was all in good fun

 

[^___ShabS___^]

ART TEACHER:
- sho fly dont bother me
- you go gurl
- liar liar pants on fire
- (when we call him ..mr..) thats my name dont ware it out
- (when we say 'excuse me' he says) what'd you do? fart or something?
- (say a students name is 'sara', he says) sara sara ur the man, if you cant do it no one can.

i'll never forget him.

 

[Sickle]

Art Teacher:
"You're LATE LATE LATE LATE LATE!!"

History Teacher:
"Now when you're in Redfern and you get attacked, run into the middle of the road. Scream, shout, jump around... draw attention to your self. Or become a dead weight."

"Don't commit suicide! I don't want to fill out the paper work...."

Maths Teacher:
"YOU ARE THE WORST MATHS CLASS I HAVE EVER HAD!!!" lol that was to my class... and he's been teaching for like 40 years or something